


Do animals have auras too?

by Orendaandthestars



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: A Little Bit Supernatural AU, Attempt at Humor, Crack and Drabbles, Human AU, Liam Dunbar is an Adorable Little Shit, Liam thinks he's Spiderman, M/M, Maybe - Freeform, Maybe there'll be a ghost later on who knows, Mild Language, Overprotective Liam Dunbar, Slow Burn, Theo Raeken is a Little Shit, Thiam, attempt at fluff
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-01
Updated: 2020-11-23
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:15:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 24,018
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27324115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Orendaandthestars/pseuds/Orendaandthestars
Summary: It all started with the Halloween party at his best friend Mason's house gone bad, Liam doesn't remember who suggested the stupid idea of playing the Ouija board game for old time's sake, probably Liam himself. But he didn't know they'd conjure up god knows what, because the next morning he finds himself able to see other people's auras, like glowing colored orbs around people. At first he just thought maybe he was still drunk or hungover, or just hungry that he was hallucinating things.But nope.
Relationships: Liam Dunbar/Theo Raeken
Comments: 27
Kudos: 26





	1. The Chase

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first crack at fanfiction and am usually anxious about writing anything but I just love Thiam, so I've decided to overlook my nagging anxieties and write about them. 
> 
> So the idea came from this afternoon game show for halloween and this woman said she could see other people's auras and know when someone's gonna die, and that just really stuck with me. So I Thiamed it.
> 
> It'll be alternating POVs, maybe, because I'm pretty chaotic that way, I have no control.
> 
> I promise the other chapters will be longer. I wanted it to be slow burn but we'll see, I'm still trying to figure shit out.
> 
> Barely beta'd so all mistakes are mine.
> 
> Anyway, kudos and comments are highly appreciated. I hope you enjoy.

It all started with the Halloween party at his best friend Mason's house gone bad, Liam doesn't remember who suggested the stupid idea of playing the Ouija board game for old time's sake, probably Liam himself. But he didn't know they'd conjure up god knows what, because the next morning he finds himself able to see other people's _auras_ , like glowing colored orbs around people. At first he just thought maybe he was still drunk or hungover, or just hungry that he was hallucinating things. 

But nope. 

Because he sees this guy walking across the street with this black colored orb thing around him, and a bus just hits him, and Liam sees him flying off into the air. Liam probably needs therapy now. 

As the people were crowding around the body on the ground with all their other colored orbs, some red, some white, some burgundy, some cerulean, Liam just backs away, too freaked out and too hungry for this shit so early in the morning. He just wants his breakfast burrito, not this Nostradamus shit. 

So he keeps walking towards the grocery store for ingredients like intended. Like his head isn't freaking the fuck out. Like he doesn't see this incredibly hot guy's back with really well defined biceps popping out of his ridiculously tight sleeves, checking out the chips aisle, with this huge grayish black colored orb _aura_ around him. _Oh shit. Oh shit. Oh shit. He's gonna die._

"You're gonna die!" Liam blurts out in front of the hot guy as he was about to grab a pack of Lay's Original flavor potato chips. _What?_

Liam did not think this through. 

A long pause. Hot potato chips guy's eyebrows are raised so high they're about to reach his perfect hairline.

"Uhhh, I don't know how to explain how I know this but I do and trust me I know this sounds so fucking weird and ridiculous and insane and I've known only this morning that I can like know when somebody's gonna die. Maybe? And I think you're gonna die 'cause you're aura's all grayish black like maybe past teal? I don't know the color's name, and I don't know why I can but I think I'm supposed to stop this from happening to people and to _you_ , even though I don't know you, because it might be like Spiderman's _'with great power comes great responsibility'_ kind of thing, and I don't know if this is a type of superpower or if maybe I'm just hungry but I don't want you to die!" Liam exhales all in one breath.

Hot potato chips guy just keeps backing away slowly.

"No, wait!" Liam rushes to go after him as hot potato chips guy brisk walks out of the store and just full on sprints as he cuts the corner of the street. _Shit_. Good thing Liam's trained for this, hours and hours of doing Lacrosse drills in highschool has prepared him for this moment. Chasing some random hot guy that may or may not die any time soon.

"I'm not insane!" Liam yells as he sprints as well, and it's a full on chase. And everybody in the street just looks at him. He mouths to them, _I'm really not_. 

"Yeah right! That's what a not insane person would say as he chases a total stranger from the grocery store telling him he's gonna die! Not insane at all!" Hot potato chips guy yells right back at him as he keeps running. He's really fast.

He's about to cross the street when Liam reaches him just in time before a bike collides into hot potato chips guy. "Fuck," Liam winces, " _Maybe I am Spiderman_." Hot potato chips guy faints.

  
  


\---

  
  


"No, Mason. I'm not _just hungry_. Well, I am hungry but that's not the point!"

Theo hears someone arguing on the phone near him as he wakes up on a park bench. Last thing he remembers is something about a weirdo chasing after him, and Spiderman, and almost dying, _oh god_. His head hurts so bad and he feels two giant bumps, one on his forehead and the other on the back of his head. 

He knows he went to get some chips for his late night binge watching of Superstore on Amazon Prime tonight. He just wanted to root for Mateo Liwanag's love life while enjoying that touch of saltiness of perfectly shaped potato crisps in his mouth in peace. Not waking up on a park bench with a weirdo shouting beside him. "Yes! Mason! It is a superpower! It is!" Spiderweirdo groans on the phone. "I'll call you later, yes, no, I will not abduct him, I promise. I know it's illegal! _Even though I'm doing it for his own good_. Okay. Fine. Say hi to Corey for me. Bye."

"So… _Hi_." Spiderweirdo says.

"Hi," Theo hesitates and quirks his eyebrows. Stealthily looking for possible escape routes.

Spiderweirdo must have noticed and blurts out, "I come in peace!" while raising both his arms hurriedly. "I'm not gonna do anything. I just want to talk." 

Theo slowly stands up, seemingly collected. And then he bolts.

They keep the chase for a while until they're both red and panting, bending on their knees. Spiderweirdo decides to collapse on the concrete. "I can't keep doing this anymore, you have to stop running away from me! I am not trying to hurt you!" Spiderweirdo shouts, a loud grumble escapes from his stomach, before Theo can react, he groans, " _God, I'm so hungry_. You know what, I'll just keep running after you until I'm puking all over and I'll just keep running after you _while_ I'm puking all over, it doesn't matter, I will hound you until I make sure you're alive for maybe at least the rest of the day, who knows, so if you have any self-preservation, you'll let _whatever this is_ ," Spiderweirdo gestures to both of them and all around with his arms like a frantic lunatic, " _happen_ , and hear me out over lunch. My treat. _Please_." Spiderweirdo pleads while checking his watch, it's noon. They've been running around all morning. _Crazy is contagious,_ Theo thinks.

  
  


They decide on lunch burritos from the food truck next to the park and sit on the same exact park bench they were at earlier. _They've come full circle_ , Theo thinks. They're both quiet except for munching noises as Spiderweirdo gobbles down two, no, three lunch burritos, cheeks full like a chipmunk, Theo can't help but think he's somewhat _cute_. _Cute in a way you find mice cute, or squirrels!_ _Yeah, squirrels!_ Theo can't seem to say anything, still a bit shocked from the whirlwind that was this morning, he looks at the lunch burrito in his hand and takes a bite of it. _Pretty good_.

"Pretty good, huh?" Spiderweirdo says, possibly hearing Theo's quiet moans while he gulped down the food, "They put mangoes in the burrito and it just makes the salty and sweet work. I love mangoes." Spiderweirdo-loving-mango says with a small smile, attempting to ease things with small talk. It was kind of working. Theo could feel some semblance of normalcy coming back to him. 

"So, uh, thanks for saving me. From the bike, I mean." Theo says, looking intently at the half eaten mango burrito like it was guilty of a crime, anger starting to seep through, the sweet and salty not working its charm, "But what the actual fuck is wrong with you?" Theo snaps, "Why the hell would you just come up to someone and tell them they were gonna die, and then chase them like a goddamn lunatic stalker?"

"I was trying to keep you from dying!" Spiderweirdo yells.

"But I wouldn't even be in the position of dying if you weren't chasing me!" Theo argues back.

"No, that wasn't what was gonna kill you, I think. I mean, ugh, look I think I have some kind of sixth sense or whatever, that I can tell if somebody's gonna die, I can see like these glowing colored orbs all around a person, like _auras,_ and I don't know what the colors mean but I know that if it's like blackish, that person's gonna die! I only found out this morning 'cause I saw a guy with a black colored aura flying through the air, a bus hit him and now he's dead!" Spiderweirdo spits out, tears rolling out, mouth still kind of full of burrito, "And I just don't want anybody to die anymore, I don't want you to die! I just wanted a breakfast burrito and maybe some guac, and lemon iced tea! Not for someone to die!" Spiderweirdo was full on sobbing this time.

Theo was starting to feel bad for this guy, he might be batshit crazy but he can sympathize with the thought of seeing someone die right in front of you. That's gotta be traumatic. And spending hours later just running around after a stranger who you'd think is gonna die. Theo can only imagine processing that shit. He'd probably need therapy if he were in his shoes.

"I'm sorry, I was rude." Theo says softly, patting Spiderweirdo's back, trying to be comforting, "You just really freaked me out, it was reflex. My flight response is pretty strong." He explains, "So, I mean, for what it's worth, thanks for _stalking_ me."

"I was not _stalking_ you!" Spiderweirdo protests, eyebrows furrowed, "I was _just_ _chasing_ you! It's different! Like when a dog escapes its leash or like when a baby carriage rolls off!" 

Theo smiles softly, breaking to a full on grin. He chuckles and can't help laugh at the absurdity of the whole thing, some little part of him believes the delirious ramblings of this lunatic. _Crazy really is contagious._

"I'm Liam." Liam says with a hand held out.

"Theo," he says still with a tiny smile, shaking Liam's hand. "So, what is this about you being Spiderman?"

  
  



	2. Eye-Spy You're Gonna Die

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where somebody's an over-achieving puppy, there's ice cream and doing laundry too. Usual shenanigans ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back and I added a few more in the chapter count just to allow myself to breathe and not cram all of what I'm planning for these two in a chapter, and an excuse for me to figure out conversations and the romance stuff. Romance stuff is hard.
> 
> So this'll definitely be slow burn, 'cause my head's gonna be slowly burning out trying to come up with shit for these two lovable shitheads to do, with actual character exploration, you know? I could only hope. 
> 
> Anyway, I'm rambling. Kudos and comments are really appreciated, please engage with me, please. Let me know your thoughts.
> 
> Again, barely beta'd cause it's almost 2am and I need to sleep.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

"That guy's navy blue! That woman's yellow ochre! Oh! And that baby's orange!" Liam whisper-shouts as they walk along the street, playing some weird version of eye-spy where you spy with your little eye if that person's gonna die. Fun.

Theo decided to let Liam tag along _just_ for the rest of the day, just to make sure he's alive. If he was being honest, he was just exhausted, Liam had broken him down. And since it's already past noon, it can't be that long since he can finally go home and relax on his couch and binge watch episodes of Superstore in peace. Without a puppy stalker hanging around him, shouting very detailed color names while rudely pointing at people. He can wait it out.

"Why can't we just go back to your place and stay there until the day is over?" Liam whines while picking at his fingernail. "I think that's the smartest move we can make knowing you might die some time today."

"Because," Theo emphasizes on every syllable like a parent telling off a child, "I have errands to do. I was supposed to grocery shop but _you_ interrupted me with _this shit_ before I can actually buy anything. And now I need to pick up my laundry, which I was supposed to get back to hours ago if you weren't chasing me all over the park. And we don't really know if that _color of aura_ actually does mean death, _not saying I believe you,_ but it could mean a lot of things, like a person's mood? Did you even think about that?" Theo explains succinctly. Liam did not think about that. "So, if you want to keep stalking me, you'll stalk me _quietly._ "

"I am not stalk-" Liam is cut off by Theo's pointed look. And thinks maybe he's right, maybe the auras were like a mood ring thing, maybe that guy was just in a bad mood and he just happens to be hit by a bus, and everything's just a coincidence.

"Well, are you in a bad mood?" Liam asks curiously.

Theo just looks at him, exasperated, and decides to ignore the question. _What do you think?_ He rolls his eyes and goes inside the laundromat, Liam follows, door closing on his face.

  
  


"Thank god they're still here." Theo says relieved, seeing his clothes in the drier. "Get that basket for me." He directs Liam, as he collects his clothes, nodding his thanks when Liam follows. 

"So, what happened after I fainted?" He asks curiously.

"Well, you hit your head pretty hard…" Liam hesitates, "like five times," he whispers.

"What?!"

"I carried you bridal style and I didn't notice in time that there were… _obstructions_ along the way." Liam winces.

"What the fuck, Liam? Five times?!" Theo's aghast, both hands lifted in the air, "How the actual fuck did that happen?"

"Look, I was really trying to avoid that, that pole, and that bike," Liam's face is all scrunched up, "and the coffee shop sign," Theo is practically seething, but Liam's brave enough to continue, "and the hot dog stand, and that guy! But that was not my fault, he just came out of nowhere!" Liam was shouting now, "There were so many people and you were so heavy! I know I'm pretty strong but it was such a busy street and the park bench was a healthy distance! I'm not some werewolf with supernatural strength!"

Theo just can't right now. He just can't. So he closes his eyes, goes to his happy place, he's sitting on his comfy couch, eating a really good sandwich, maybe it has mangoes in it, who knows. When he notices Liam's gone silent.

He sees Liam frozen, his head almost inside the machine, staring. Cheeks starting to color as well, _oh shit._

In Liam's hands were Theo's underwear. 

Theo's colorful pairs of briefs. 

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

There were baby blues, pinks, really bright red ones, a few ones with prints, it was a wide array of assorted colors and patterns, some even neon, paisley, cartoon, and Liam can't help but think of Theo wearing something like this right now under those tight skinny jeans. He gets lost in his own head trying to wonder what type Theo could be wearing right now, he's starting to feel hot. 

Theo immediately grabs them from him and shoves them into his bag. "They're a gift!" Theo blurts out embarrassed, face all red reaching down to his neck, "From my mom!" Theo winces, _like that's believable, who's gone insane now?_

Liam nods fast, like one of those car toys that bob their heads, like the whole thing makes sense, no reason to doubt, no judgement, we're just people. "I like the lemon yellow one with the light bulbs on it!" Liam exclaims, grimacing. _Idiot_.

A pause. Theo's eyes searching Liam's. Face blank, void of emotion. _Oh no, I've broken him,_ Liam panics.

And then Theo just bursts out laughing, full blown cracking up, alternately hiccuping and giggling. Eyes wet from tears, his embarrassment slowly fading. He exhales deep and satisfied. Liam can't help feel relief as well, a smile tugging on his lips, breaking into a full on grin.

"If you really like them, I have an extra pair at home." Theo says, "They're new! Don't worry." he assures. 

"Uh, yeah, thanks. I'd like that." Liam says, smiling awkwardly, cheeks starting to redden again, he really does like light bulbs and the color yellow.

\---

"Liam, you don't need to follow me to the toilet." Theo says annoyed, backs to each other while Liam hovers next to him in the urinal like a tiny overly enthusiastic bodyguard. "I can't _go_ with you hanging around my shoulder." 

Liam's been following Theo around all afternoon, from the laundromat, to the bakery, even to his office when he dropped by for a last minute work thing. _Following_ is an understatement, _caging_ him is more appropriate given that Liam kept on circling him using his arms as a protective barrier whenever there was a _possible_ threat. If you can call a person giving out flyers a threat, or a baby carriage a threat, or even a puppy on a leash! This was becoming more and more ridiculous than it already was when it started, and so over-the-top that Theo couldn't even have five minutes of peace in the toilet. He was about to pee his pants.

"But what if something happens to you?" Liam fusses, "What if there's a pervert that comes in and asks for sex and then stabs you if you refused? Or, or what if there's a guy that asks for your money and then stabs you if you say no? You'll die!" he whisper-shouts. Nodding at the middle-aged man hurriedly zipping his pants up and leaving. Theo just looks at Liam incredulously.

Although possible, Liam doesn't necessarily think he's actually stab-proof now that he has acquired some kind of color-inclined, death-predicting supernatural power _, or maybe he does?_ But he's not really willing to test that aspect of his power now and be a human shield. But be Theo's human shield? _Hmmm..._

"The only pervert here that _will_ get stabbed is _you._ " Theo declares. Shaking Liam out of his thoughts. "Go wait outside, Liam."

"But TheoOoo," Liam whines, Theo's name has never been pronounced in so many different octaves of distress until now. Puppy dog eyes staring right at him. _Why was Theo so weak?_ "Liam, for the love of-," puppy dog eyes growing even bigger, Theo sighs, feeling defeated. "Fine, turn the fuck around and give me some space. And cover your ears, I can't pee knowing someone's listening on purpose."

A few beats later, Liam was starting to get impatient and honestly a bit worried, Theo was really taking his time.

"Uh, Theo? Do you need some help?" Liam asks after a while. Too late in realizing how stupid that question sounded. "I mean, like do you need me to open the tap? You know, to motivate you?" _Yup, bury yourself deeper into the hole you dug, Liam, it's weird enough you followed this hot guy to the toilet_ , Liam winces. Theo's gone all quiet but then he remembers he's covering his ears, _duh,_ so he decides to turn around a bit, _just to check._ Just a peek to check if Theo's done. _That's all._

He suddenly remembers Theo's briefs. _Oh shit, Theo could be wearing one of those quirky kinds. Is it one of those pink ones? Theo would look good in pink._ Liam thinks, curiosity spiking a tinsy bit.

Liam turns around slowly, a little excitedly, pink starting to color his cheeks.

But Theo's gone.

He must've snuck out when Liam was standing there like an idiot, because when Liam comes out, Theo is cackling so hard that he's having a hard time breathing. _Shit, he looks good even when he can't breathe,_ Liam thinks.

"Took you exactly 6 minutes and 25 seconds. That's a personal record." Theo says in between inhales, at least he's breathing now.

"You timed me?! I was standing there for more than 5 minutes looking like an idiot with hands on my ears! I looked like one of those monkeys!" Theo was full on cracking up again, "There was even a guy who just stopped in the middle of opening the door and gave me a weird look! I thought he was some weirdo, _but I was the weirdo!"_ Liam rambles on mortified, shocked by the betrayal.

"And you thought standing behind me while I peed wasn't weird at all?" Theo says in disbelief, eyes squinting at Liam.

"Shut up."

Theo was still snickering when Liam shoves him playfully, "Sorry, sorry. Come on, let's go get ice cream. My treat." And drags Liam by the arm.

"Fine," Liam can't help but smile a little, but he's still obviously mad at him, _like really mad,_ "but I get to choose how many scoops, and I want those weird artisanal fruit flavors, so don't be stingy!" 

  
  


"So, what about Spirit Warrior? For my superhero name. Spiderman has a cool name, and I am kinda like Spiderman, doing the moral good saving lives and all. And it kinda fits my origin story," Liam justifies as he gleefully licks his spoonful of mango and dates flavored ice cream. Theo snorts loudly, "Oh pup," he says while shaking his head, "I don't think that name is in your league, given _you._ " He gestures to Liam's _everything._

"Okay, rude?" Liam says annoyed, "I _can_ be a warrior! I can have a weapon, maybe a spear, y'know? I can get a spear! Or a sword. _Maybe a knife._ " 

"What is with you and stabbing people?" Theo snorts and Liam glares at him, "I don't think Spirit Warrior fits the given nature of your _power?_ Being a mood ring doesn't exactly give off warrior vibes." Theo explains mockingly, a _Hey!_ lost in the background in protest, "How about Mood Boy? Or like Puppy Phantom? That'd be perfect for you." Theo says matter-of-factly and boops Liam's nose. 

Liam feels his cheeks warm. Why does he get easily flustered whenever Theo teases him? He knows Theo's pretty hot. _Sure._ Especially those pretty gray eyes with bright green flecks on them. And those huge strong arms and chest. _Pretty and hot._ No, no. Pretty hot. Just pretty hot. _But he's such a little shit,_ Liam argues.

"Okay, so I'm not saying I agree with your _theory,_ but let's say hypothetically it is about people's moods and not about me being the death-whisperer. So, then why is yours almost black?" Liam asks genuinely concerned, "Are you not okay?"

"I, I-" Theo stutters, caught off-guard with the sudden question, trying to think of a vague dismissive answer, he doesn't really want to deal with an existential crisis right now, and not to a _total?_ stranger, but there is something about Liam and the worried look he has on his face that melts something numb inside Theo. He takes a deep breath. "I don't know, to be honest. I don't know if I'm okay." He admits finally.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Liam says, placing a hand carefully on Theo's arm, tiny spoon on the side of his mouth, "If that's okay, I mean? I know we just met and all, but I can listen to your problems. We don't have alcohol but we have ice cream, it's the next best thing," he says with a small smile.

Theo chuckles a bit, "I guess I've just been exhausted lately, working for big pharma means long hours and very little breaks. I keep thinking if this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life and I can't help but dread that kind of future, stuck in a lab, you know? I wanted to be a chemist because I wanted to do something essentially good for this world, and part of it was for my sister, Tara, but the intent gets watered down by interests of huge companies, you begin to wonder what the point is. I've been feeling so tired and lost lately, I haven't had the time to just think and breathe." Theo sighs heavily, shoulders dropping, "This was actually the first time in a long while that I got the weekend free." He says with a small resigned smile.

" _Oh,_ " Liam can't help but feel guilty, face grimacing at the thought that he's been making Theo run around with him all day, constantly badgering him, and following him inside toilets. 

Theo must've noticed because he quickly amends, softly touching Liam's arm, trying to calm him from looking like a kicked puppy, "I admit, today had a rocky start, and it has been a while since I've done that much cardio, and I wasn't able to buy groceries and the chips I've been dying to get," Liam winces as Theo continues, "To top it off, getting hit in the head like five times? I'm surprised I don't have a concussion. Oh! _And_ lest we forget the possibility of my imminent death today, that's still a _pretty huge_ _bummer_ ," Theo breathes out.

Liam's expression just sinks deeper and deeper, shoulders hunching, " _But,_ " Theo cuts, the ends of his lips slowly curving upward, "I don't think I mind it as much as I thought I would. I think it went _pretty okay,_ " he says with a reassuring nod as he smiles at Liam, "all things considered."

"Yeah?" Liam says, a toothy grin on his face, "All things considered," he repeats.

" _Oh!_ " Liam gasps, a tiny glint flashes in his eyes making them wide and giddy, as a sudden thought occurs to him. Theo looks at him concerned. Liam finally sing-songs, "You like meee," and Theo looks like a deer caught in headlights, a slight blush creeping into his cheeks as he quickly pushes Liam's face away with his palm. "You like meee," Liam repeats, bouncing on his heels.

"I take it back. Today was the worst." Theo says grumpily.

"You can't do that!" Liam protests, words muffled by Theo's hand in his face.

  
  


"So, do animals have auras, too?" Theo asks after they've calmed down a bit, licking what's left of his avocado and chocolate ice cream cone, Liam looks at him suspiciously, he's thinking if this is a serious question or is Theo making fun of him again, he can't trust him anymore, not after the toilet incident. But that is a pretty good question.

"I don't know?" Liam says, "I haven't really seen animals today, I've seen birds but they fly fast and I didn't really notice." 

"Wanna find out?" Theo says after a beat, a hint of excitement in his tone.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Huh." Liam says underwhelmed, staring at a couple of ducks floating in the pond, "So, my death-predicting powers only extend to humans. This was anticlimactic. I was kinda hoping I'd see their auras too." 

"Really? Do you really want to know when animals are going to die too? Again, not that I'm saying your _powers_ really do predict people's deaths, but do you really want to add that on your plate? I think it'd be difficult when you're in a seafood restaurant, _oh no that lobster's gonna die, and that shellfish!,_ that kind of thing. I can imagine it's gonna be pretty hard to stop them from dying." Theo says thoughtfully.

"Well then, I just won't eat at seafood restaurants forever." Liam pouts, arms across his chest.

Theo chuckles, after a beat he says, "Or maybe you _can_ see their auras but you just need to get closer? The ducks _are_ pretty far away," a certain cheerfulness in his tone.

Liam eyes him suspiciously but decides to walk closer to the pond, kicking a few rocks on the way. Theo follows closely behind him.

"No shit!" Liam says excitedly, bouncing on his heels, "They have auras too! Theo, they have auras too!" Liam moves even closer to the edge of the water, squinting his eyes looking far off, "Oh no, that duck's gonna die! We need to save that duck, Theo!"

He suddenly notices Theo's a lot closer than he expected, too close that he feels heat on his side where Theo was standing. Liam swallows the sudden lump on his throat. He feels Theo slowly putting his arm on his shoulder and Liam's heart starts to beat fast like a jackrabbit at the contact. He can feel Theo's breath on his skin. He's really really close. Liam can't help feel the warmth starting to spread in his chest and his ears. _Is this really happening? Oh god. Oh god. Oh god. Is this real? Oh, but this really is a romantic setting, a beautiful sunset overlooking the water, just the two of us. Oh god, was this a date? Does Theo like me that way? I know I'm here to save his life and all, and maybe that duck's too, so maybe it's like a savior-savee kind of attraction?_ Liam's ramblings suddenly get interrupted when he sees Theo's all-knowing smirk and the menacing twinkle in his eyes. 

_Liam, you idiot._

And that was Liam's last thought before he died. 

Well, not really.

"Go save the duck, Liam!" Theo suddenly shouts, laughing really hard, a hand gripping on Liam's shirt as he tries to push Liam into the pond, _he's not really gonna push him._

"No, Theo! No!" Liam pleads.

And then a huge splash.

Things happened so fast, yet it felt like everything happened in slow motion, Theo's eyes blown wide, mouth gaping like a fish as he grabbed onto Liam with both arms in a futile effort for support as he loses his footing and slips, the longest _Noooo_ Liam has ever said in his entire life escaping him, arms flailing in the air like a madman as they both crash into the water. 

  
  



	3. Do ducks eat pizza?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where we finally find out why Liam knows so many color names and Theo's interest in quirky underwear. Liam finds a sidekick and Theo's just done.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was planning on posting a longer chapter but I'm too sleep-deprived to finish the other parts, so hey, why not just post what we have? 
> 
> Not much on the supernatural aspect of the universe happens here, just more on Thiam hanging out. We'll explore that on the later chapters I promise. Fingers crossed.
> 
> Barely beta'd so all mistakes are from sleep deprivation. I tried.
> 
> Kudos and comments and prompts are highly appreciated. Talk to me about anything Thiam. Please.

It was a quiet walk from the park to Theo's apartment, except for the sloshing sounds coming from their wet socks. Liam could feel the cold draft from the wet clothes clinging to his skin and the soft light feathers of a semi-restless duck. It finally stopped its incessant quacking. _Finally._

"Liam, you are not gonna bring that duck inside my apartment." Theo suddenly says, shivering, spraying water droplets in Liam's face as the hair clinging on his forehead swishes when he turns around.

"But Theo, I can't just leave it anywhere! What if something happens to it? What if someone duck-naps it and decides to eat it? And why are you the one who's angry? I'm the one who's supposed to be angry!" Liam's gone all red now, " _You_ were the one who _pushed_ me!"

Theo suddenly stops mid-stride, droplets falling on the pavement, making Liam suddenly stop too, a surprised quack escaping the duck.

"Well, I wasn't really gonna push you! But you kept on flailing like an idiot that I lost my balance! Now we're both soaked in pond water and you're carrying a duck," Theo grumbles, "I take it back, this is the worst day ever."

"You're blaming me?!" Liam shouts, appalled at the nerve, the duck flapping both its wings in the sudden movement of Liam's arms as he tries to raise them in disbelief. 

Theo's gone quiet again, eyes squinting as pond water rolls down his face, he's looking at anywhere but Liam, "I'm sorry." he finally spits out and then continues walking, stride a lot quicker than before.

"You're not that good at apologies, huh?" Liam says with a smug look, walking quicker to catch up, Theo just sighs exageratedly. "Fine, I'm sorry you fell into the pond," Theo says rushing the words.

" _Because?_ "

"Because I _pushed_ you." Theo finishes, resenting every syllable of the sentence.

"Apology not accepted." Liam says proudly, Theo's mouth gapes open. _The audacity of this crazy little shithead,_ Theo thinks.

"Oh, don't worry, I'm not mad anymore, Theo." Liam says with a sparkle in his eyes, "' _Cause I'll get even._ You won't see it coming, maybe it won't happen right away, and maybe you'll forget about it. And then BAM! Pond water in your coffee, in your shoes, your bed, pond water where you least expect it, Theo. I will _Amelie_ your shit." 

_He really is insane,_ Theo thinks. He's doubting now if he should even let Liam into his apartment. 

Liam must've sensed Theo's hesitation, "I'm kidding!" He quickly takes back. Theo just exhales, shoulders finally loosening up a bit. 

"Or am I?"

Theo just runs away now. No care for getting hypothermia.

" _Not again!_ " Liam says exasperated, "Theo, I was just kidding! Wait for me, I'm freezing!" Liam shouts and hurries after him, both hands on the duck as it tries to flap its flightless wings away from the crazy.

  
  
  


Liam catches up to him just in time for Theo to close his apartment door right in Liam's face.

"Theo! Theo, please open the door! That was a joke, don't be scared of me," he assures as he keeps on the frantic knocking, no longer carrying the duck as it walks around the hallway, it's wet webbed feet pitter-pattering on the tiled floor, quacking in front of a neighboor as she hurriedly closes the door. 

"I know you can hear me!" Liam yells after a while, fists tired from pounding, "I'm freezing, Theo, I'm dying! Me and Mr. Quackers are dying from hypothermia, Theo. Do you want us to die from hypothermia here in your hallway, Theo? Do you?" 

Liam hears a huge sigh at the other end of the door and hears the clicking of opening locks. One, two, three. _Three locks?_ Liam rolls his eyes. _Rude._

"I come in peace." Liam assures again, arms raised in a familiar gesture. But before Theo can remove the final chain, "Leave the duck, Liam," he says peeking through the door crack, a towel on his head.

"I can't!" Liam protests, kneeling down to call on Mr. Quackers who surprisingly comes to his arms, flapping its wings in a sad attempt to fly towards him.

Theo just looks half annoyed and half in awe, "Liam, I swear to god if that thing poops on my floor-"

"No! No, he won't, I promise, he's tamed!" Liam protests, gently cradling Mr. Quackers, a hand on its feathers, "Aren't you a good duck, right Mr. Quackers? You won't poop or pee on Theo's floor, right?" He says to the duck, surprisingly the duck makes a tiny quack in agreement. Tired of _this shit,_ Theo just opens the door to Liam and Mr. Quackers, his head is starting to hurt from the crazy.

He throws a towel on Liam's head, and Liam looks at him with a toothy grin. "Thanks!"

"Are you really planning on keeping that duck as a pet?" Theo says in disbelief.

"Mr. Quackers is not a pet, _he's my sidekick._ Superheroes need sidekicks." He smiles at the duck, the duck just stares at him, "Plus he's nice, he kinda grows on you. I think he knows I saved his life. _Unlike someone else I know._ " Liam whispers to the duck.

Theo just closes his eyes, a permanent crease starting to form in between his eyebrows. _Why can't this day just end? Why did I have to let this lunatic inside?_

"I'm only keeping him until I know he's okay, until the black _aura_ thingy changes color. I don't think I can live with myself knowing some innocent creature might die and I wasn't able to do anything about it." Liam explains.

Theo just looks at him incredulously, "What happens when you see other _creatures_ with that so-called black aura? _What then, Liam?_ Are you gonna follow them around all day? Are you gonna bring them home? What if it was a cockroach? Are you gonna take care of a cockroach, Liam?" Theo points out in a sarcastic tone.

That's a good point, Liam did not think this through. _Again._ He hates cockroaches and spiders, worms and other creepy crawlies. He shivers at the thought.

Theo sighs, "Look, you have to understand that death is a natural part of life, it's the only sure thing in this world and we can't stop it, no matter how much we beg the universe," Theo pauses, "and if I die tonight or tomorrow or next week, it is how it is."

Liam can't help but feel sad about what Theo just said, eyes starting to feel wet as he looks down on Mr. Quackers.

Theo must have realized the weight of his words, but that's what Liam needs to hear, tough love and all. _Love?_ No, no, no. _Tough Platonic Feeling._ Yeah. Yeah. _Tough Platonic Feeling_ sounds right. That's what he's feeling right now as he stares at Liam quietly sniffling, ugh, _why was Theo so weak?_

Theo hands him a tissue. Liam dries his eyes and blows his nose loudly, Mr. Quackers startles at the sound. 

" _But,_ again I'm not saying your _powers_ do tell when someone's gonna die, we don't know that yet, right? It could just be a sign of distress, you know? The black aura thing." Theo tries reassuringly.

Liam's shoulders relax a bit.

"Why don't you go take a shower first, I'll let you borrow some clothes. You smell like pond and duck." Theo scrunches his nose.

Liam glares at him but follows, placing the duck in Theo's arms. Theo doesn't move.

  
  


\---

  
  


Liam steps out of the shower and finds a shirt and a pair of sweatpants, and _oh my god, a pair of lemon yellow briefs with light bulbs on it! He will wear this to his grave._ Or until he loses it, he doesn't know why but he just keeps losing underwear and socks, and sometimes shirts too! He thinks his apartment might be haunted, 'cause some Narnia shit is definitely happening in his dresser.

"I'll order us pepperoni pizza!" Theo shouts from the kitchen, "I like garlic shrimp flavor! And do ducks eat pizza?" Liam yells back. 

Theo just rolls his eyes muttering to himself _Garlic Shrimp flavor? Who even likes that?_ and googles 'Do Ducks Eat Pizza?' 

Liam's snickering when he hears Theo shout back that they can't and that he'll order the duck some salad instead.

  
  


"Thanks for the clothes… and the briefs. I love it." Liam says, a light blush on his cheeks maybe from the hot shower, maybe from something else. Theo just nods, a little too happy but he doesn't try to show it as he rushes to the bathroom, "Get the door for me when the pizza guy gets here. I left the money on the counter."

  
  


They were sitting on the kitchen stools next to the island, pizza boxes wide open in the middle, Liam on one end, Mr. Quackers right next to him on the floor with his own plate of greens and picked-off shrimp from Liam's pizza, he seems to like the garlic shrimp as he quacks and gobbles in satisfaction, Liam looks at him like a proud dad. Theo just chews in fascination at how this is happening in his kitchen.

"So, what's with the underwear?" Liam asks curiously, garlic shrimp pizza in his mouth, pepperoni pizza on one hand. 

"Uhhh," Theo's brain short circuits, and he stares at Liam for a while, face with an unreadable expression, cheeks starting to color. _Uh-oh,_ _I've broken him again,_ Liam thinks. 

Silence seems to take the whole apartment except for the satisfied quacking, "They're gifts from my mom!" Theo blurts out a little too loud, wincing at the volume of his voice.

"Okay?" Liam looks at him like he's grown two heads.

"They really _are_ from my mom," Theo exhales, a little embarrassed, "It started as a joke on my fifteenth birthday, spearheaded by my evil sister, and it just stuck, you know? They kept giving me these colored pairs of briefs every time there's some kind of celebration, not just on birthdays, like Christmas, Fourth of July, Pride, even Thanksgiving! It started pretty innocently with the designs too but then it got ridiculous, and some were like really _hideous,_ especially the ones from my sister, one time she gave me knitted briefs for Christmas, with like matching gloves and a scarf! They were so itchy and ugly! I couldn't wear it!" Theo chuckles at the thought.

"I guess they've grown on me that I started looking forward to getting them. Now it's just my mom who sends me stuff, ever since my sister died." Theo pauses, a silent grief passing on his face.

"Tara," Liam says and Theo just nods, "What happened, if you don't mind me asking?"

"She got really sick just after highschool." Theo says, not really wanting to push any further. 

"I'm sorry," Liam says, "she sounds like an amazing sister," a greasy yet comforting smile on his face as he looks at Theo. 

"Yeah, me too." Theo says with a small smile.

  
  


"So," Theo clears his throat, "Wanna watch Superstore?"

  
  
  


They sit on the couch side by side as an episode plays on the TV, the one where they find Sal's body in between the drywall of the store on Halloween, a sandwich on Liam's hand, mouth full like a chipmunk as he laughs loudly when they make Sal a part of the Halloween decorations. 

"Do you ever stop eating?" Theo looks at him in fascination.

"Shut up, it's been a really long day." Liam whines, "Just let me beee, I finally don't smell like pond and this couch is to _die for._ " Liam sinks himself deeper with a sigh.

Things have pretty much calmed down, Theo's not sure if he should tell Liam to stay over since it's getting pretty late. He realizes he's pretty harmless and just insane to a manageable degree, even the duck isn't so bad, its head resting on Liam's lap. _Oh fuck it._

Theo clears his throat, why was this so hard? It's just Liam, we're… we're _friends? Are we friends? I don't even know anything about him,_ Theo realizes, staring at the side of Liam's face as he snorts when the kids are taking photos with Creepy Sal's corpse, crumbs falling from his cheeks, _he's disgusting, that I know for sure._ Theo can't help think of it as almost adorable. _Almost._

" _So,_ " Theo says, "What do you do?"

Liam just stares at him at first, a little dubious at the sudden interest. 

"Like for work, you mean?" Theo nods, "Oh, I'm an art restorator. I work for a local gallery. I do restorations of paintings and sometimes sculptures." Liam says proudly, Theo did not expect that. _That doesn't seem like a crazy occupation,_ he thinks. 

Liam must've figured out what he was thinking and shoves their shoulders together, Mr. Quackers slightly lifts his head at the movement. 

"How does one become an art restorator?" Theo asks, genuinely curious.

"I studied _Fine Art_ in college. I'm still learning a lot when it comes to certain materials, but you need to have a background on the different brush strokes so you can recreate them and basically how to blend and mix colors and certain types of paint. You have to especially be careful with the cleaning, too. It takes quite some time, but it's worth the effort when you finally see how the artist wanted you to see it." Liam says.

"I'm impressed." Theo says, nodding his head.

Liam can't help but make a big smile.

  
  


"You do know you can't make me go home, right?" Liam says, Theo's face drops. 

"You can't keep on saying things like that, Liam." Theo huffs, "It makes you sound like a creep. Are you trying to freak me out again?"

"What? No!" Liam argues, "What I'm trying to say is I can't leave you because you might still die! We don't know what might happen, Theo, someone might burglar you and then stab you in your sleep!" Mr. Quackers is awake now, _flying_ off the couch.

Theo's head is starting to hurt again with Liam's incessant brand of crazy, or it might be a minor concussion, he did hit his head like _five times._ He probably needs to put ice on it.

Theo gives up, he was planning on asking him to stay anyway. _God, I've really gone insane._

"Fine, you can sleep on the couch," he finally agrees, "but if the duck poops on the floor, you're going home."

"Mr. Quackers will not poop on your floor." Liam promises confidently, hand raised in a mock-pledge, looking at the duck as it follows Theo into the bedroom.

  
  


Liam sinks again into the couch, _he loves this couch._ A pillow on his head and a really soft fluffy blanket covering him up to his feet, Mr. Quackers resting on top of his stomach, Theo quietly retreats to the bedroom, turning off the light. 

"'Night, Theo." Liam mumbles already half asleep, "Thanks for letting me not let you die." 

Theo just looks at Liam's carefree face, "Yeah, yeah. Good night." He says with a light chuckle.

  
  


\---

  
  


The next morning Theo wakes up to a warm pressure on his neck, he blinks and sees it's from Liam's fingers.

Liam's fingers are on his neck. _What?_

"What the fuck, Liam?!" Theo startles, Liam startles back and falls off the bed. "What the fuck are you doing?" 

"Shh! Stop yelling! Mr. Quackers is still asleep!" Liam whisper-shouts, "I was just trying to check your pulse! I wasn't trying to strangle you, if that's what you're thinking!"

Theo looks at him incredulously, then falls back into his bed, already feeling tired so early in the morning.

"We need to go to a hospital!" Liam blurts out out of nowhere, "I had an idea as I was falling asleep with Mr. Quackers last night and I just couldn't wait to tell you! We need to go to a place where people are _for sure_ gonna die!" He declares. Theo's too stunned at this point to react. He just can't catch a break.

"It's five in the morning Liam, on a fucking Sunday." Theo grumbles, "Why on earth do _we_ need to go to a hospital? And what makes you think I'll participate in _this,_ in _whatever_ this is?" Theo waves his finger at Liam.

"Please Theo, _please!_ " Liam begs, "We need to test out my powers in a place where people are _for sure_ gonna die. If their auras are black then it means I was right! And I am a harbinger of death!" 

Theo can see the point, that is a pretty brilliant idea. "What I don't understand is why do I need to come with you? On my day off?" He questions.

"I can't leave you alone! Theo, we've been over this a million times, I'm trying to save you." Liam says exasperated, like Theo's the one who isn't making sense here.

"And we've been over this a million times, you are insane." Theo says mockingly.

Liam looks at him, puppy dog eyes trying to work its magic, plump lips in a full on pout. _Ugh._ But he's so tired, it's been a while since he's spent a whole morning in bed. 

"No." Theo says quickly as he covers his head with the duvet, ignoring Liam's protest, Liam just keeps on whining and tugging the duvet off. It won't work, Theo as a giant burrito is stronger than Liam's crazy. 

Silence.

Theo feels a rustling underneath the duvet, and cold feet, _shit._ Liam keeps on squirming and wriggling, trying to find a comfortable position, his arm ends up on Theo's chest, holding tightly, his other leg on top of Theo's waist. He's spooning Theo like a huge fucking koala bear. Theo can't breathe.

He's starting to feel hot and not just from his blanket burrito, it's been a while since Theo's actually been touched by another person, he shivers at the contact. _It kinda feels nice,_ Theo thinks. His heart starting to beat fast when Liam positions his face on the back of Theo's neck. He can feel Liam's breath, it's giving him goosebumps.

"Liam?"

"Yeah?" Liam says softly.

"What are you doing?" Theo asks, his tone coming out a lot softer than he expected.

"I figured you wanted to sleep more, right?" Liam says innocently.

A few beats later.

"You're hot." Theo declares.

"Why thanks, Theo," Liam says, a smirk on his face.

"That's not what I mean," Theo says, "Not that you're not hot, I mean, you are, you're really attractive and you have a nice body," now it's Theo's turn to be hot, he needs to shut up now.

"You're not so bad yourself." Liam whispers, his breath making the hairs on the back of Theo's neck stand up.

"Do you want me to go?"

"No," Theo says after a while, "'S okay," he mumbles.

Theo's starting to fall asleep, the reassuring hold lulling him, the rise and fall of Liam's chest a comforting feeling.

Theo feels Liam's fingers slowly caress the side of his arm, brushing the tiny hairs softly. 

He falls, he completely falls.

  
  



	4. Where are the people who are for sure gonna die?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Theo and Liam eat brunch, and are married in a hospital and have a baby. They perform a top-secret mission, and Theo's spy acting skills are put to the test.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> Again, thank you so much for reading this story and for the comments and the kudos. It really means a lot to me, like a lot. Talk to me about anything, like a random idea we can make these two lovable shitheads do.
> 
> Btw, I changed the writing style a bit and the tenses. Sorry not sorry, just trying something new and testing the mood of the story? Let me know which one you prefer. It still is pretty much drabble since I don't really plan this shit and just go with it.
> 
> We scratched the surface of the supernatural here, but not really? It's still mostly Thiam hanging out and Liam's crazy infecting Theo's crazy. Or maybe they're just both crazy, who knows?
> 
> Barely beta'd, so all mistakes and typos are my headache's fault.

Liam suddenly woke up to a buzzing from the bedside table, his phone screen lighting up from the call, it's Mason. He forgot that Mason was coming by his apartment to pick him up for brunch, because that's what they do as bros for life, they have brunch on Sundays, it's a tradition. The kind where they're no longer embarrassed to sing-song _'Sunday Funday',_ even making up a choreography- a combination of hands slapping all over their bodies in synchrony and a high pitched song version of Sunday Funday as the move reaches its climax. That's the kind of life-long friendship they have, a deep shared love for brunch and the guts to dance the dance in public, sober.

_He must feel so betrayed!_ Liam thought as he scrambled to reach for the phone, not noticing the warm presence of someone else underneath him, right hand trying to grab the phone, left hand digging into Theo's chest, a sudden yelp escaping a no-longer-sleeping Theo followed by a loud groan, "What the hell?" tone confused and still a little high on sleep. Liam just looked at him, his eyes wide and blinking rapidly as he surveyed their positions, half of Liam's torso was on top of Theo's, both legs tangled together, duvet scrunched up at the end of the bed, "Sorry, sorry." Liam winced an apology. More sorry about waking Theo not because he _woke_ Theo, but because he woke Theo from their impromptu cuddling, because it felt nice. Like _really_ nice. 

He hadn't expected Theo would respond so amicably in his attempt to annoy him to go with him with his plan, which was to go to the hospital and look for people who had black auras and check if they were gonna die anytime soon. It was easy and simple, and if he had to admit a little proudly, it was perfect. What surprised him was that his plan to push Theo to come with him by force-cuddling him as a huge koala bear of heat did not work and not only did it fail epically, Liam fell asleep as quickly as Theo did once he had latched onto him. Not that he was disappointed in the least, he'll just have to change tactics and go back to the drawing board of his brilliant and highly effective plans. Fine. _Mostly_ effective plans. Putting a pin on Koala Liam as another strategy to bring out an amicable and cuddly Theo for later.

Liam snapped out of his daze when he realized the phone stopped vibrating. Mason must be so worried. Liam had never missed Sunday Funday, even on his deathbed he'd probably climb out of the window if it meant he could get there just in time for brunch, doing their Sunday Funday dance off. He needs to call him back. 

Liam felt the panic rising in his chest as he looked at Theo looking at him and their pressed bodies, faces too close to be considered normal. Maybe normal for other people. They've jumped too many steps that they need to reevaluate their normal. 

"Uh, hi," Liam said eloquently, Theo just rolls his eyes and rubs on his chest, feeling it start to bruise, a light scruff on his face that only accentuated his jawline beautifully, that wasn't fair, Liam had thought. "Sorry about _this."_ He gestured to him caging Theo with his body, arms both on Theo's sides. A soft blush was creeping on Theo's cheeks. Liam's gaze seemed to trail from Theo's pink cheeks to his perfect nose to the green flecks of his eyes. Liam couldn't help but get lost in them. 

Neither one seemed to want to break the tension when Liam's phone started to vibrate again. Liam answered immediately, forgetting that he was still lying on top of Theo. He flopped on Theo's chest as he lost balance from raising an arm to his ear to answer the phone. A loud 'oof' escaped Theo. Theo seemed too resigned and still reeling from the effects of Koala Liam that he had willingly allowed Liam to answer the phone in their current position, eyes closed as Liam pressed the green button. "Mason! Man, I am so sorry!" Theo could feel Liam's chest vibrating as he talked to this _Mason,_ who probably was Liam's voice of reason if he remembered correctly, he was the one who stopped Liam from his kidnapping plans. _Thank god._

Mason was the cricket to Liam's Pinocchio, Theo thought. And Liam was a strange wooden boy who suddenly came to life, now trying to learn how to live without his strings. It actually explained so much of the crazy. 

"I know! I know I promised I would never miss our Sunday Funday brunch!" Liam yelled.

"Dude, I'm already at your apartment, I've been knocking on your door since forever!" Mason huffed, "Where are you anyway? I sent you like a million texts! You stopped responding after you told me you were planning on abducting an unconscious person! Liam. Please tell me you didn't."

Liam winced, he knows Theo could hear everything.

"I didn't! I didn't!" Liam protested, "Not really abducted- nothing you can say that's completely illegal…"

Liam felt Theo snort at that last part. His chest shook in the gesture. But he didn't _really_ do anything illegal, he just followed Theo around to warn him from his imminent death and maybe stop so-called death from happening. If anything, the police should even thank him for doing their job. Heck, the police should be the ones arrested! But he doesn't plan on telling Mason that part though. The chasing around the park part or the following into toilets part or the falling into the pond part. 

"What did you do, Liam?" Mason sounded exasperated. Liam pictured Mason pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. 

"I told you, nothing illegal! I promise!" Theo started to chuckle. "I just followed Theo around to protect him, because he was gonna die! Well… _probably_ gonna die. That's why I can't come to our brunch, you know how much I treasure our Sunday Fundays, Mase, but this might really be life or death." Liam slapped Theo in the chest when he started to break out into a full on laugh, an 'ow' escaping him.

"What? Why do you think he's gonna die?" Mason asked, concerned, "Is this about the _power_ thing again?"

"It's true, Mase! I think we conjured up some power-granting ghost when we played that old Ouija board game at your place, I'm telling you, that shit's haunted."

"It's an Ouija board, Liam. It's supposed to _be_ haunted." Mason huffed. "So you think some ghost gave you powers that can make you see when people are gonna die?"

"Not exactly _when_ they're gonna die, more like I can tell they're gonna die soon. _Probably._ Either that or I'm like a mood ring, and the auras I see are just people's moods and the black means they're just having a bad day. That's what we're trying to find out." Liam said, Theo mouthed an incredulous _we?_ at the statement, Liam can't stop himself from rolling his eyes, mouthing a _yes, we_. Theo just groaned, and flopped his head harder into the pillow. This was gonna be another long day of Liam's crazy. He doesn't know if he can fight it anymore. Not that he ever did in the span of a whole day they were together and he just met Liam. He tried but he almost got hit by a bike so…

"Alright, alright, buddy." Mason said. "So you're still at that guy's place? Wait, he's that really hot guy from the grocery with the beautiful arms but had awful taste in chips, right?" 

"Shhh, shhh!" Liam shushed. "Alright Mason, gotta go, man! Talk to you later! Byeee!" 

Liam was mortified, he didn't know if he was mortified that Theo now knew he thought he was _really hot_ or that his arms were beautiful, or that he knew that Liam thought his taste in chips was awful. Liam winced. Who even likes potato chips that are just plain salted? Theo was glaring daggers at him when Liam looked up. _Uh-oh. Koala Liam no longer effective._

"Can you get off me now?" Theo said angrily. He was mad, mad at Liam for thinking that Lay's Original was an awful choice for a snack. Petty as it seemed, Theo valued his couch-binging snacks like he valued his friends. They were there for him when he needed them, when he came home tired and just wanted to relax on his couch, watch something trashy on TV, they completed his night without judgement, hanging out with him for the sole pleasure of Theo and Theo's mouth. _That did not sound right._ But yes, Theo was mad. Liam insulted his _friend._ And Theo didn't have many of them.

"Sorry." Liam winced as he tried to scramble off of Theo, grasping onto Theo's shoulders as he tried to shimmy off the bed, Theo grabbed Liam's waist and lifted Liam off, manhandling him like they were doing a grouchy horizontal ballroom dance in bed. 

"So what time should we leave to go to the hospital? I was thinking maybe after we eat brunch and maybe drop by my apartment to bring Mr. Quackers home unless they allow ducks in hospitals?" Liam braved to ask. Theo huffed annoyed. Choosing to ignore Liam's ranting and proceeded on grabbing the duvet and lifting it over the bed, tidying it up. Liam hovered over his shoulder like a sugar glider. When Liam realized Theo was intentionally ignoring him, he decided to put operation Koala Liam to use again, albeit prematurely since Theo froze up at the contact from Liam's arms as he latched onto Theo's chest, the gesture similar to someone giving the heimlich. 

"What the hell are you doing, Liam?" Theo said. A little too out of breath. The hold was pretty tight. "You weren't answering my question!" Liam justified. 

"So you thought I was choking?" Theo looked over his shoulder at him, one eyebrow raised high.

"No! I wasn't think-"

"What were you thinking then?" Theo questioned, his voice a little raised, eyeing Liam dubiously.

"I don't know. But it worked this morning!"

Liam overestimated the efficacy of Koala Liam, apparently it only applied to a tired and broken-down sleepy Theo. Liam took note of that and removed his death grip. Theo inhaled and exhaled like it was the first time he breathed oxygen.

"What's wrong? Let's talk about it please." Liam whined.

"Don't wanna." Theo clipped like a petulant child. He continued fluffing up the pillows and angling the decorative books on the bedside table with a scrutinising eye.

"Is this about what I said to Mason?"

"I don't know, Liam. Is it?" Theo mock repeated.

"'Cause I won't apologize for thinking you're really hot and had beautiful arms that could probably carry a house."

"What? No, that's not it-" Theo can't help but blush at the compliment.

"If this was about the chips thing, Theo, you pushed me into a pond." Liam had one last trump card, and he was not afraid to use it.

Theo gaped. Stunned at the guilt-dickmove. Liam was trying to suppress an upward tug forming on his lips as he relished the fishlike face Theo had made. "Fine! But I already apologized for that."

"But I didn't forgive you, now did I?" Liam countered smugly. _Yup he was insane, why do I keep forgetting,_ Theo thought. "I just don't understand why anyone would think plain salted chips to be their go-to junk food. I mean, that's why they call it junk! It's supposed to be something wild and really bad for you."

"Well I do and I don't care what you think. I love it. I love it so much I can marry it and have so many potato chip babies with it. All of them just plain and salted. No garlic shrimp or mangoes or lunch burritos." Theo said with a high pitched mock tone that was supposed to sound like Liam.

"And what's wrong with garlic shrimp? Mr. Quackers loved it! And don't pretend you didn't like the mangoes and the lunch burrito 'cause I swear-" Liam said hand raised in disbelief as Theo scoffed in response. "Mr. Quackers is a duck, Liam. He'll probably eat shit and he wouldn't even know the difference!"

"You take that back!" Liam yelled as he inched forward, not noticing how close they had both gotten to each other, heaving chests inches from almost touching. Pointed index finger at Theo's chest. Theo gulped and Liam's gaze followed the movement in his throat and trailed to Theo's lips, which he unconsciously licked wet. God, they were so close.

"Make me." Theo egged.

Liam was not really good at thinking things through. He mentally shrugged his shoulders and said _Fuck it_. He lunged forward and attacked Theo's lips with his, their mouths crashed together. He was kissing Theo. But Theo was not kissing him back. Oh no, I broke him. _Again._ Liam thought. He opened his eyes mid-press of his lips on Theo's. Theo's eyes were blown wide in sheer shock. Lips unmoved. _Shit._

Liam jerked back. Unpressing his lips from Theo's, mortified. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I thought you wanted to- I thought we were-" Liam was cut by Theo's lips crashing into his this time, a lot more graceful than what Liam did, a little less teeth, but Liam was not complaining. Theo kissed him back. _Oh._ Liam thought. _Oh wow._ Theo's lips were plump and soft. _So soft._ Like pillows, pillows you can never get enough of, pillows you want to bury your mouth into and bite. Wet, hungry pillows that kissed Liam's own pillows.

The kiss was not gentle, far from it. It was hungry and aggressive, like something finally opened the floodgates and it was a wave of their tongues trying to reach inside each other's mouths, trying to taste each other but not getting enough of it. It was wet and messy and a little bit annoyed still from the previous comments thrown about each other's god-awful chips and shit-tasting garlic shrimps.

A small moan escaped Liam as Theo bit his lower lip and pushed his tongue softly inside Liam's again, licking his tongue in invitation. Liam's own reached forward, licking back, until their mouths are closed in again, kissing deep.

Theo placed his hands on Liam's chest, about to push him onto the bed. _Oh shit._ Liam thought in excitement. _Are we really gonna do this?_

They were not. 

Theo was suddenly interrupted by an incessant and painful pecking. He jolted, suddenly lifting his leg away from the attack-pecking, a loud 'ow' escaped him as Liam lunged forward to grab Mr. Quackers away from Theo. 

"What the fu- control your animal, Liam!" Theo scowled. Glaring minutely at Mr. Quackers. Rubbing his shin and the back of his leg as if to soothe it.

Liam didn't know if he was gonna be upset or amused by the sudden attack-pecking from Mr. Quackers. Clearly he was just defending his honor like all good sidekicks do. But he honestly didn't want his honor to be defended. He wanted to be pushed onto the bed aggressively by this really hot guy, and be kissed and manhandled and more. Alright, he was a little more upset. He was clearly cockblocked by a duck. He was duck-blocked. Liam sighed looking down at Mr. Quackers disapprovingly.

As if it sensed Liam's disapproval. The duck flapped its flightless wings out of Liam's grip and proceeded outside of Theo's room. Webbed feet tapped lightly on the wooden floor. Liam slowly glanced at Theo, who was now sitting on the bed with legs still lifted a little higher off the floor. Red on his cheeks at the sudden attention, and maybe still reeling from the sudden bout of whatever that was earlier he was about to do to Liam.

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have, I-" Theo cleared his throat.

"It's okay." Liam assured. As a smile creeped into his still kiss-bitten lips. "It was _more_ than okay."

"I should insult you more often." Liam said. A snort escaped Theo's which turned into a light chuckle.

"Breakfast?" Theo said.

"Nope. Brunch." Liam smiled.

  
  


\---

  
  


Brunch consisted of scrambled eggs and bacon courtesy of _What do ducks eat for brunch?_ Minus the booze because Theo refused to make Liam a mimosa even after Liam's persistent justification that brunch was supposed to have mimosas. That it wasn't brunch without mimosas, and Mason, and if he wasn't gonna have Mason for Sunday Funday brunch then the least Theo could do for him was a mimosa. 

"No, Liam. I will not make you a mimosa. I am not your bartender, this is not a hotel." Theo said with a frown. Liam grumbled as he took the cup of coffee Theo placed in front of him. Mr. Quackers happily swallowed his plate full of duck-friendly brunch sitting on the stool next to him. "And is the duck really eating with us now?" Theo asked incredulously.

" _The duck_ has a name, it's Mr. Quackers. Well, you can tell him yourself. If you can." Liam said challengingly. The duck suddenly lifted its head at Theo like it was glaring at him if it were ever to have eyebrows.

Theo just closed his mouth, defeated by a duck.

Liam was still the same considering what they did earlier, Theo thought. He was still the same brand of annoying and crazy and they were still bickering like their tongues weren't down in each other's throats a few minutes ago. _What was that?_ Theo thought. _What is wrong with me?_ He didn't understand what came over him when Liam suddenly kissed him. He didn't understand the effect Liam had on him, he infuriated him and creeped him out but at the same time he wanted to kiss the crazy shithead's lips until it was swollen and bruised. The only reason Theo could think of why he'd ever do whatever that was, was that he was insane. _I'm insane_. Theo thought with finality. Liam had spread his _insane_ to him like cooties.

"I was thinking after this we can go to my place just to take Mr. Quackers home and then go to the hospital." Liam brought up again. "Liam, we've talked about this, I just want to relax at home and maybe watch a few more episodes of Superstore and maybe a long bath." Theo said pleadingly.

"But Theo, it'll just be a quick trip I promise, we'll be in and out of the hospital, we don't even have to swing by my place, I'll just hide Mr. Quackers, nobody'll notice him." Liam bargained. "I don't want anyone dying today. _Please._ "

Theo sighed. Every arguing bone in his body turned to mush from the exhaustion. He was gonna regret this.

"And you pushed me into a pond." Liam blurted. 

Theo glared at him at the last retort, then sighed exasperatedly, shoulders dropped. "Fine." 

"Really?" Liam asked disbelievingly. He didn't think Theo would finally agree without another fight or one of Liam's tactics. "Okay. Thanks!" Liam smiled. Theo just sighed again heavily. 

"But if the duck poops in my truck, I swear Liam, I will _intentionally_ push you into another pond for the ducks to eat you." Theo said.

"He won't! And ducks don't eat people. They don't even have teeth." Liam said confidently, Theo just looked at him with an eyebrow raised. "Do they?" Liam asked nervously, frozen in his seat. As if on cue, the duck looked at Liam, a glint in its eyes which seemed to him a little manic for a duck, Liam's face dropped. Theo snorted and broke into a cackle, fingers gripping on the island counter to support himself as he heaved. Liam tried to throw a piece of bacon at his face in petty revenge but Mr. Quackers suddenly swooped in time to catch it with his bill. Liam's mouth gaped open, stunned at Mr. Quacker's betrayal and acrobatics, and a little dad-proud at the now possible duck pageant opportunities.

  
  


"Now, do you have a white blanket?" Liam finally asked a few beats later.

  
  


\---

  
  


Theo didn't know what the blanket was for until they reached the hospital and saw Liam wrapping the duck in the white cloth, like swaddling a baby. The duck kept flailing its wings and flapping them out of the hold but Liam managed to rope Theo into helping him hold down the wings, evading a few pecks, until Liam managed to finish the swaddling. _Why on earth does Liam know how to swaddle?_ Theo thought, a crease on his brow forming again.

"It would've been better if we had a baby carriage. But I didn't think you had one, did you have one?" Liam asked hopefully.

Theo sighed. "No, Liam, I don't have a baby carriage at home. _I was hit by one though._ " Theo repeated mock-cheerfully. This was a stupid plan. People are gonna know that it's a duck they were carrying and people are gonna think they're crazy. _Oh god,_ Theo thought, _they're gonna think I'm crazy._

"It's gonna work, don't worry. We just have to pretend it's our baby and keep it close so people won't notice." Liam assured as if he heard Theo's exact thoughts. As if it made complete fucking sense. "It worked with your doorman, it should work here."

"What do you mean it worked with my doorman?" Theo asked skeptically.

"When I was chasing you into the apartment yesterday, I had to sneak Mr. Quackers in. I hid him in my shirt! Good thing he started flapping his wings and quacking when we already reached your floor or else that would've been a _weird_ experience." Liam explained a little proudly.

Theo was stunned. He didn't know if he should be shocked at Liam's definition of a _weird experience_ or if it was a good thing Mr. Henry, his doorman, was going senile or else he'd probably be evicted from his nice apartment. But the people in the hospital weren't senile. Well, maybe not all of them? Shit can hit the fan, and he can be thought to be insane by association. They were walking into the lion's den for chrissakes, they could be put in the psych ward for all they know and he'd have to be stuck there with _Liam._

Theo was completely panicking now and he was all fidgety, beads of sweat formed on his forehead as they entered the hospital lobby with the swaddled duck pretending to be a baby in Liam's arms. "We just have to sell it, put your arm around my shoulder." Liam whispered, urging Theo. "Why don't we pretend you're insane and you think this duck is your baby instead. I think that's more believable." Theo whispered back, Liam rolled his eyes.

Surprisingly nobody batted an eye at them, everybody minding their own business, looking at their phones or looking dead-exhausted waiting, not even a glance at the tiny quack that accidentally escaped Mr. Quackers when Liam stopped shushing him for a moment as he gave Theo the swaddled duck to approach the nurse's station. Liam gave him a look as if telling him to continue the said shushing and cradling of the _baby._ Theo rolled his eyes exasperatedly but continued shushing and rocking the swaddled duck. 

"Excuse me. Hi!" Liam greeted cheerfully to the nurse at the station, she had a blue greenish aura to her. Theo and their swaddled duck baby a few meters behind him. "Where are the people who are for sure gonna die?" Liam asked.

"Excuse me?" The nurse said, clearly stunned and misapprehended.

"Like the patients who we know are gonna die really soon?" Liam repeated. "You know, like the terminally ill?"

The nurse was speechless, mouth gaped open with a confused expression on her face. Theo winced at the exchange, pinching the bridge of his nose and stepped beside Liam. "Babe, hold our baby." Theo said with a southern accent as he handed the swaddled duck baby to Liam, Liam looked at him incredulously. _What?_ Theo approached the nurse this time, gently putting a hand at the small of Liam's back, a soft blush on his cheeks formed from Theo's touch.

"I'm so sorry for the confusion, and for my husband, don't mind him, he ate too much shrimp." Theo said, with a remorseful expression, looking guiltily at the nurse, southern accent still in place. "We're gonna visit my aunt and she was supposed to be checked-in. She's really ill and she wanted to see her grandson before she passed. Her name's Janette Jackson." Liam tried to laugh but Theo pinched him hard at his side, a silent hiss escaping him. "Do you mind helping us out?" Theo said nicely. Liam shivered at Theo's performance. It was uncanny. Liam wondered maybe Theo did acting in school, _maybe he still does?_ Theo was really full of surprises.

Liam was surprised that there was an actual patient named Janette Jackson in the hospital, and that Theo hadn't lost his mind and started talking about a famous person to the nurse like she was his aunt. When the nurse actually gave Theo the directions, they hurriedly proceeded to the wing before the nurse noticed the swaddled duck they were carrying. "I'm sorry but babies are not allowed inside the rooms in that wing!" The nurse shouted as Theo and Liam brisk walked away from her. "Don't worry it's not a human baby!" Liam yelled back as they turned at the next hallway.

"How did you do that? How did you know there was a Janette Jackson here? Do you have powers too?" Liam asked with a small gasp, eyes wide like a child's as they surveyed the rooms and windows, looking at patients and their auras, and some of the clip boards. Theo shrugged, a little smug smile on his face. Liam was impressed, Theo really _sold it._

"I couldn't have done this without you." Liam admitted gratefully, clapping him on the shoulder.

"Yup." Theo said with a pop on the P. "Just don't put pond water in my coffee." He smirked.

"Shut up." Liam said, he couldn't help but smile himself. "So how'd you do it? How'd you know?"

"Astute powers of observation, my young padawan." Theo said smugly. "I saw a patient's black tag on a hospital bed as they rolled her away. I just read her name. Black tags are for patients who are either deceased or in pain management so."

"Wait, she was dead?" Liam asked, shock flashing on his face.

"Yup." Theo said again with the P popped. 

"Did we just use a dead woman's name?" 

"Yes, Liam." Theo hissed. "And I pretended she was my aunt, good thing they haven't updated their system yet or else we'd have to both cry and I don't think your acting skills are any good." 

Liam looked horrified. " _Oh shit._ That was bad. That was so bad, Theo. I can't believe you did that, _we_ did that." Liam's face sunk in the realization.

"Pot-kettle Liam, you think you asking about people who are _for sure_ gonna die was any better? And we didn't kill her." Theo scoffed. "If I didn't say what I said, we wouldn't be here in this wing."

" _Fuuuck._ You're right. I'm sorry this was a bad idea. I'm a horrible person. Oh god, I think I'm gonna be sick." Liam was panicking, hands braced on his knees while Theo held Mr. Quackers. 

"Liam." Theo said, trying to call his attention as he knelt down and put a hand on Liam's shoulder. "Liam, look at me." Liam finally looked up. "You're doing this because you wanted to see what your power could do, right? You wanted to know if you were this _harbinger of death_ so you could maybe stop other people from dying, right?" Liam nodded, finally calming down a bit from his momentary meltdown. 

"Okay." Liam said as he stood up taking a deep breath, grabbing the swaddled duck again from Theo. 

"Okay." Theo said.

"Thanks."

"That was brilliant by the way." Liam quipped with a small smile as they went around another hall. Theo grinned. 

"And fuck you I can cry on cue." Theo laughed.

  
  


There were oranges, blues, aquamarines, yellows, a few dark browns and dark greens. But so far no one with black ones. They checked the clip boards for what the patients were confined for, googled some of the technical terms they didn't know. Even if the patient was diagnosed with a horrible disease, they didn't necessarily have a black aura. The shades were sometimes a little darker but a few of them were really bright. 

"So this was confusing." Liam huffed, sitting on the passenger side of Theo's truck. Theo was sitting on the driver's side, hands on the steering wheel, hunched over feeling exhausted. The duck finally set free from its swaddled prison and flapping its wings and wiggling its tail feathers in the back seat. 

"Maybe it was because they weren't going to die really soon? Like really really soon? And that's why their auras are just darker shades. But it doesn't explain the bright yellow ones and the pink ones."

"Maybe I was right and you _are_ insane." Theo said dryly and Liam glared at him. "Or maybe it was based on how they were feeling, maybe they were still hoping they'd get better? Maybe despite of the sickness, they weren't unhappy? And maybe some of them were, you know, happy? Maybe the colors change everyday just like emotions do, like it's based on the peace or the contentment or whatever you allow yourself to feel?" Theo exhaled as he fell silent for a moment, gaze a bit faraway, arms crossed on the steering wheel.

"Theo? You okay?" Liam asked quietly, like he was talking to a small animal, afraid of startling it. He touched his shoulder lightly.

"Yeah, yeah. I'm fine." Theo woke from the daze, he smiled but it didn't reach his eyes. "I'm okay. I just don't really like hospitals is all."

"I'm really sorry, Theo." Liam said, he felt the guilt creeping in his chest, he had dragged him around again. Theo just shook his head. 

"You wanna eat?" Liam asked cheerily. "Come to my place, I'll cook for you." 

Theo snorted. "You? Cook?" 

"Hey!" Liam hissed, earning Theo a backhanded slap to his chest. "I make pretty good Gambas Al Ajillo, if I'll have you know." 

"Liam, that's fucking shrimp pasta isn't it?"

"Maybe." Liam sing-songed, a wide toothy grin on his face. 

"Fine, but the duck can't sit with us."

"No can do, buddy." Liam smirked as Theo put the key into the ignition, the sky almost falling to dusk, coloring everything with a gray light.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So why not kiss amirite? Was that too early? Ehhh. We'll deal with that at the later chapters, don't worry about it.
> 
> Anyway, thanks @LI0NH34RT for the idea of how we can sneak the duck! I had so much fun writing that part.
> 
> Thanks again for reading and I hope you enjoyed it.


	5. The Muppet Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Liam just has a weird thing for toilets and vitamins and Theo has a weird thing for pharmaceutical mayhem. Liam and Mason are snooty brunch people.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi again!
> 
> I am back with this monster chapter, baby monster chapter? Welp, it's the longest I've written I think. Took me a while to finish this one for I have fallen into the hole that is the Thiam Big Bang 2020. All the amazing fics and art! And I've just recently dug myself out.
> 
> There's development in the supernatural of this supernaturally adjacent universe but it's still mostly Thiam hanging out and sometimes being ridiculous. And feelings. Sometimes.
> 
> I tried. I really tried. I hope it makes sense.
> 
> Again, thank you so much for giving this story the time of day and the comments and the kudos, you guys are so nice. It means a lot! Feel free to give me prompts too 'cause it's like water to me and I am parched.

"Black isn't even a color, you know." Liam said as he carefully stirred the pot of pasta sauce, back against Theo as he sat on the chair, staring at a painting of the sea with a silhouette of boats on it, the gloomy sky a mix of blended and unblended colors of blues and oranges and greens, propped up on an easel in the corner of the room, next to the big window with pots of plants in varying ceramic sizes and shapes. Liam must've noticed because he quickly adds, "It's beautiful isn't it?" Theo nods, gaze still focused. "You can look at it closer if you want, just don't touch it of course, I haven't applied the varnish yet." Theo slowly walked towards the painting, Liam trailing behind him, Mr. Quackers somehow asleep in his very own makeshift box bed. "It's impressionism, from the 19th century. It's a commission from a private collector, it's in pretty good condition so it generally just needed cleaning." Liam explained as Theo surveyed the colors and the bold strokes in the sky as if in a trance. 

"The colors are beautiful." Theo said in awe. 

Theo can't help but feel a little melancholic as he gazed at how the light reflected on the boats, how the sky changed its colors from sunset to dusk. How the tealish grays brought out the bright oranges and the stark sun. How Liam eagerly explained how the piece encompasses the passage of time, a soft and gentle smile on his face. Theo hadn't seen this expression on Liam before. _It was truly beautiful._ He thought.

"Dinner's almost ready." Liam said as he walked back to the kitchen.

Theo eyed Liam warily as he stared at the perfectly plated bowl of shrimp pasta. It really smelled good but knowing Liam, he didn't trust what he put in it. "Don't worry, Theo, it's not poisoned." Liam rolled his eyes. "And you should know I won't try to kill you, I'm trying to save your life, remember?" Liam looked at him like all Theo's inhibitions were absurd. Like he didn't threaten Theo of putting pond water in his food among other things, or poorly manhandled him that resulted in him having a minor concussion, or the stint at the hospital that might have put them in the psych ward if people found out they were bringing a swaddled duck and pretending it was their child. Liam killing him was not what Theo was worried about. Nope. It was what he can do that won't probably kill Theo per se, but what could possibly make Theo want to kill himself instead. So yes, he'd very much prefer to take care of the food handling himself, thank you very much.

He didn't notice the forkful of pasta shoved into his face making him swallow it unwillingly, like a japanese speeding bullet train crashing into his mouth. Theo's eyes widened at the sudden force, he had let out an 'mmph' as his teeth scratched the utensil. But he didn't expect melting into the taste of the pasta and the sauce and the _fucking garlic shrimp_ . _Why was Liam so full of surprises?_ Theo glared.

"See, nothing to be scared of." Liam said smugly.

"Not bad." Theo grunted as he chewed, tomato sauce dripped on the side of his mouth as he took another bite. "I can see that." Liam smiled and handed him a napkin to clean himself up. Theo cleared his throat. "So, what were you saying earlier about black not being a color?" 

"Oh yeah, I was thinking about what you said earlier in the truck?" Liam started. 

"That's a first." Theo snorted which earned a glare from Liam. "I was thinking," Liam repeated, emphasizing each syllable, "about your theory that the colors could be based on what the person allows himself to feel, right?" Liam said as he chewed another forkful of pasta, none seemed too concerned about table etiquette, mouths full as they talked, both engrossed in Liam's _pretty good_ shrimp pasta. Theo nodded as Liam went on. "You see in art, black is not considered to be a color, it's the presence of _all_ colors. Like if you're painting and you mix all the colors together, you'd get black, or well some semblance of it." 

"It's different in physics though. With physics, black is the absence of color since it doesn't absorb light." Theo countered.

"Oh. Okay." Liam thought for a few moments. "Then maybe black doesn't necessarily mean death or anything bad contrary to how we usually associate it with? Because if we think that a color could mean an emotion or a feeling, then it means _you_ either might be full of feelings or lacking of it?" 

"So which are you?" Liam concluded.

Theo froze mid-chew, Liam's question marinating in his head, he hadn't really given it much thought. He hasn't _had the time_ to give it much thought. He didn't want to admit that there are days that he feels numb, like he's going through the motions, where everything seemed routine. Robotic. But then it gets too much and it gets overwhelming that he can't breathe and his chest feels like it wants to explode. Like it is gonna explode and he has to grip on something physically to hold himself together. 

Theo sighed. "I don't really know, to be honest, I sometimes feel nothing and everything at the same time. It feels so empty and overwhelming and it makes it hard for me to breathe. Like there's a slow and steady squeeze in my chest, it's there everyday, when I go to work, when I eat, when I talk to people, it's there. I don't know when it started but it wasn't always like this y'know?" Theo said, his gaze averting Liam's.

"Do you know why it's happening?" Liam asked, eyes looking directly without hesitation, just pure concern.

"I do. I think I do." Theo admitted. "I know it's mainly because of work, I just feel really tired of it. Like really tired." Theo said, Liam's face had a somber look to it, both his arms propped at the table as he listened intently. "I guess I wanted to do it not because I _wanted_ it but because I knew I'd be good at it. Mostly it was for Tara, but now that she's gone, looking back I don't know if I even really liked it. Maybe I thought I did but it felt more like a goal I was trying to reach the end of." 

"I'm kind of a little envious of what you do." Theo chuckled. "It hit me differently how you get to see so many beautiful things with what you do. And I realized I want that." Theo said as he met Liam's eyes with a determined look. "I want that." He whispered, more to himself than to Liam, as if it was a mantra, as if he could forget it at any moment. 

"Maybe you need to give yourself time to figure out what you want to do, Theo? You don't have to be really good at it, what matters is you like it." Liam said earnestly, a palm placed on Theo's hand, the warmth a comforting presence. "You deserve to be happy." Liam smiled, and Theo couldn't help but doubt it. He didn't really think it was important to _be happy._ He never gave it much thought or attention. It felt foreign to him.

"I-" Theo hesitated, trying to form the words past the lump in his throat, but all he could say was "Okay." 

"Okay." Liam repeated.

"What about acting?" Liam asked a few beats later. "You were pretty good back there in the hospital."

Theo snorted. "That was just from watching too much Downton Abbey, Liam."

Liam was dumbstruck as he recalled Theo's dramatic performance at the hospital. _What the fuck? That was British?_ Liam thought. "Okay okay, no acting." Liam snickered while Theo eyed him dubiously.

  
  


"But I think we still need to test out the auras, but this time with a different demographic." Liam said as he gave Theo a second helping of pasta, hoping Theo won't notice the blatant buttering-up.

"We?" Theo repeated, eyebrows raised in disbelief. "No no no. I won't be dragged into this again. And I'm gonna be busy the whole week in the lab. So even if I want to, which I don't, I can't come with you to whatever the hell you're planning." Theo's hand flailing to Liam's everything.

"Wha- but Theooo." Liam whined, hand reaching out and gripping tightly at Theo's hand as it held the fork, preventing Theo from swallowing another mouthful of pasta, Theo swatted it away. Liam scrunched his face and rubbed the bruised area. "But Theooo." Theo mimicked in a higher pitch, lips curved mockingly as he glared at Liam. "No, Liam. No ifs, no buts, no coconuts." Theo sing-songed as he shook his head and took the mouthful of pasta hanging for too long on his fork.

Liam needed to change tactics, he still needed to keep watch of Theo, he needed to know where he was and what he was doing. _Just to make sure he's okay._ Liam thought. _Not like stalking. That's absurd._ _And they were friends, it was okay to know what friends are doing and where they are all day, right?_ And it's not like abduction if Theo _decided_ to stay in his apartment, maybe he needed to check something out in Liam's bedroom and _accidentally_ get himself locked in there? _No, there's a window there and we're not pretty high up, he'd escape._ Liam thought. _But the bathroom could work. The window's too high up and narrow, his biceps won't fit. And he can sleep in the tub._

"Theo you should go to the toilet!" Liam blurted out a little manic, Theo eyed him skeptically. Liam cleared his throat. "I mean, do you need to go to the toilet, Theo?" Liam repeated all nicey with feigned calm and collectedness.

Theo was startled at the sudden question, eyes wide and questioning at Liam. "Maybe later?" He said slowly as he finished his second bowl of shrimp pasta, eyeing Liam dubiously as Liam poured a little more than necessary wine on his glass, recalling Liam's pretentious declaration earlier that _they're eating Gambas Al Ajillo with a bottle of red wine, not juice, they're not savages._ "Have some more." Liam said as the red liquid almost reached the rim of the glass, a manic toothy grin on his face.

Liam stared at Theo as he drank the last drop of red wine and whatever liquid Liam poured, and excused himself to go to the bathroom. 

"Liam? I think something's wrong with your door?" Theo yelled from inside the bathroom after a few minutes, trying to mask his worried tone as he tried to jiggle the door knob open, feeling the cold sweat forming on his forehead. _Shit._ Theo thought. _I knew it._ He shouldn't have let his guard down, there was a fucking reason why Liam kept on supplying him with wine _and then orange juice_ when they finished the bottle even though that was an obvious red flag because Liam would rather be caught dead than serve orange juice with his Gambas Al Ajillo. _Shit._

"Liam? Open the goddamn door! I know you can hear me!" Theo yelled from the other side of the door. "I can see your feet!"

"Something's wrong with the door, Theo, it's stuck!" Liam said innocently as he faux jiggled the knob.

"The only thing that's wrong is your head!" Theo shouted angrily, as he banged on the door. "Let me the fuck out!" _Fuck, he can't fit in the tiny window to escape._ Theo thought as he surveyed for possible escape routes. _Liam thought this crazy shit through._ Theo tried to jam the door open with his body, only flailing dizzily backwards on the toilet seat with his side sore instead, feeling tipsy from too much wine. _9-1-1!_ Theo remembered. Theo started to look for his phone to call for help. He needs to call the police to save him from being trapped in Liam's bathroom and Liam's crazy. Disappointment fell on his face when he remembered his phone died earlier and was charging in the living room. _Fuck. Shit._

"I can call the superintendent tomorrow morning to fix the door, you're gonna be okay, Theo." Liam said in a calming serial-killery tone.

"The fuck do you mean I'm gonna be okay? I am not okay! I will never be okay after all this!" Theo yelled a little manic as he crouched down to peek at the crack between the door and the floor. "I can see the fucking legs of the chair, Liam, you're blocking the door on purpose! I'm not stupid, open the fucking door!" Theo banged again, Liam flinched at the sudden force. 

"Wha- I'm just sitting!" Liam blurted out, clear panic in his voice. "I was just tired of standing around since I'm so full!" Liam reasoned as he winced at the obvious excuse.

"Liam." Theo called out, tone a lot calmer than Liam had expected, like he was talking to a four year old who drew on the walls with a permanent marker. "Liam, listen to me, I have work tomorrow and I need to go to the lab early." Theo was practically begging now, if force won't work with the idiot behind the door, maybe calmly reasoning would. _You wouldn't want to antagonize crazy._ Theo thought. He felt a little more sober, feeling the inebriation seeping through. He wiped his face with his hands in frustration. "Liam, please. I promise, I'll let you know I'm okay. I'll update you whenever I can. I just need to go home tonight."

"But- but I can't let you be by yourself, we still haven't proven I'm _not_ the harbinger of death! We don't know what'll happen, something might still happen." Liam pleaded. "You can sleep in the tub? The tub's pretty comfy. I'll give you some pillows and a blanket? And maybe Mr. Quackers so you won't get lonely?" 

"So what? Are you planning on keeping me in your bathroom forever? What if you need to shower or pee? Are you gonna pee in your sink, Liam? What if you need to shit? _Are you gonna shit in your sink?"_ Theo tried to reason out, calm facade gone as his voice started to raise in exasperation.

"I- I-" Liam mumbled as he tried to think where and how he's gonna go do _number 2._ _Shit._ Maybe the neighbors? But Liam hates them for reporting him to the landlord earlier for bringing _a duck_ into the building. _Traitors!_ Good thing the landlord believed him when he told him that Mr. Quackers was his therapy duck. _Why did he have such regular bowel movement? Why can't he be constipated when he needed it?_ Liam huffed. Cold sweat started to form in his brows. "I won't poop!" He declared.

Theo was reaching his limit, he needed to change tactics. Theo started rummaging through the bathroom cabinet, Vitamin C, Vitamin K, Multivitamins, Aspirin, Vitamin A, Vitamin E, Vitamin C again. _Why does Liam have so many vitamins?_ "Liam, if you don't let me out, I will kill myself with these vitamins!" Theo said as he shook a bottle of vitamins loudly at the door for Liam to hear. _Insane situations call for insane measures._ "I will overdose myself on these vitamins, Liam, and when I die I will haunt you. I will haunt you and your duck, Liam! You're gonna wish _you_ were dead."

"Pshhh, you can't die on vitamins!" Liam said dismissively.

"Oh yes I can, I'm a chemist, I know what vitamins to mix, I can be the Vitamin Unabomber, Liam, I'll make my internal organs explode." _Insane situations, insane measures._ Theo repeated. "I'll drink all of your Vitamin A first, I'll have great skin, but my liver will die for sure. Then I'll drink all of your Vitamin E, it can cause hemorrhagic bleeding, do you want my liver to die and my brain to bleed, Liam?"

Liam was panicking, Theo was still enumerating how he was going to make the perfect killing vitamin, Liam was frantically circling around the bathroom door, clutching on his hair, he didn't know vitamins were so dangerous. "-then I'll take all of your aspirin and Vitamin K so I'll bleed-" Theo was cut off by a scraping noise outside, probably the chair blocking the door being lifted, "Okay, okay. I get it, just please promise me you'll let me know what's going on with you, okay?" Liam asked defeatedly.

"Yes, Liam." Theo said exhaustedly. It was tiring being a Vitamin Unabomber combined with dealing with Liam's borderline illegal plans. "I'll give you my number, _even if every fiber of my sane being is telling me not to._ And I'll tell you where I am or what I'm up to so you can stalk me because at this point I know you will." Theo sighed. He's broken now.

"I'm not! I'm not gonna stalk you." Liam denied. _He will._ "And it's not stalking if you know." Liam added as he unlocked the door. "Pretty sure it still is, buddy." Theo said as he finally stepped out of the steamy and tensed bathroom, he breathed deeply in relief. "Are you mad?" Liam asked as he avoided looking at Theo, guilt clearly on his face. "I'm pretty sure you're the mad one." Theo snorted, surprisingly no harsh tone in his voice. 

Theo sighed. "I should be." Liam was still looking at something on his shoes, Theo was standing in front of him, back still against the bathroom door. "But honestly, I'm not." Theo said as Liam finally looked up, eyes wide and hopeful, so deep and so blue staring up at him. Theo knew he was done for. In some fucked-up _following you to toilets and locking you up in one_ way, he couldn't hate Liam. He was so done for. _Was this Stockholm?_ Theo thought. _Shit._

He could feel Liam breathing, and for some reason he could hear how loud his heart was beating. It thump-thump-thumped quickly. _How did they get so close again?_ Their chests were almost touching now, and he found his hands on Liam's waist pulling him closer, Liam's hands were on his neck and his shoulder, the touch felt warm and gentle, caressing the small hairs on his nape, Theo preened into the touch. 

Theo pushed his lips to Liam's softly, chaste and light, like it was testing the waters. Eliciting a soft moan from Liam as he dove further, deepening the kiss, turning it wet and warm and hungry, chasing Liam's taste with his tongue, Liam opened his mouth inviting Theo in, licking inside Theo's back. Liam's hands raced to touch everywhere, gently tracing Theo's shoulders and to his chest, feeling the hardened abs, the soft skin that peeked from his shirt. Theo seemed to melt into the touch, cupping Liam's jaw with his hand like Liam could slip from him any moment, gripping his waist and holding him to steady the deep kiss. 

Liam motioned his kisses to Theo's neck, sucking and nipping at it hungrily, licking softly at the dip between his neck and shoulder. A moan escaped Theo's as he gripped harder onto Liam's shoulders. "Liam-" Theo said softly as Liam trailed upward to lick his ear. Distracted by the electricity and the painful hard-on he was feeling against the denim of his jeans pressed closely against Liam's thigh, as Liam continued to rub against him. 

"Liam." Theo called again. "Yeah?" Liam whispered, voice soft and low against Theo's ear as he continued nipping and licking the lobe, another soft moan escaping Theo. "I think I need to go home." Theo mumbled, it sounded more like a question than a reminder, he wasn't really sure if he still wanted to go home, not with Liam's warmth against him, not with Liam's kisses he can taste. Liam sighed against his neck. "Okay." Liam said, a little disappointment in his tone, as he pulled away slowly. Theo quickly dismissed the rejection Liam felt by pulling him for another searing kiss, a last taste before he went his way home. Theo spoke, breaking the kiss, Liam's face reaching for it unconsciously, "I just think things are moving a bit fast and it's confusing me, and I'm…" Theo hesitated as he cupped Liam's face. "I'm stopping before I could lose all my self-control. For now." Theo said as he smiled reassuringly. "You make me so-" Theo paused as he searched for the right words in Liam's eyes and nose and soft lips. "So unguarded." Theo finished, a hint of concern in his tone. Liam kissed him again, a little softer than before, an affirmation. "Okay."

"I should lock you in bathrooms more often." Liam said, a small grin on his face as Theo moved to get his things and headed towards the door. 

Theo frowned. "Please don't."

  
  


\---

  
  


Liam woke up early to his phone buzzing. He groaned, it was five in the morning. There's no way anybody's awake at this ungodly hour. Liam fumbled for his phone buried somewhere under his pillow, the brightness blinding him momentarily as he swiped to unlock the screen, a rectangular shaped light ingrained in his eyelids whenever he blinked. He opened his phone's messaging app, it was a text from Theo.

  
  


**_Theo_ **

_(Received 5:03am)_

_On my way to work._

_(Sent 5:05am)_

_Alright honey, take care. :)_

_(Received 5:06am)_

_The fuck? Go back to sleep._

_(Sent 5:07am)_

_Your bedside manner is awful._

_Text me when you get there._

_No texting while driving._

_(Received 5:08am)_

_Yeah, yeah._

_You too, babe._

_(Sent 5:09am)_

_I think I'm gonna be sick._

_(Received 5:10am)_

_Shut up. You started it._

  
  


Liam snorted and quickly fell back to sleep. He woke up to his alarm two hours later. A couple of messages from Theo pinged on his notifications.

  
  


**_Theo_ **

_(Received 5:56am)_

_Here at the lab. Got coffee._

_Still alive._

_(Received 6:20am)_

_Went to the toilet. No one got stabbed._

_Still alive._

_(Received 6:35am)_

_Back at the lab, we're developing a vitamin._

_Guess what? Still alive._

  
  


Liam just rolled his eyes at Theo's blatant mockery and shot off a quick text before he started getting ready to go to work at seven in the morning like a normal person.

  
  


_(Sent 7:10am)_

_Well don't test it out on yourself,_

_your head might explode._

  
  


Liam headed to the kitchen to make some coffee when his phone buzzed again.

  
  


**_Theo_ **

_(Received 7:13am)_

_Don't worry. My unabomber skills only apply in toilet prisons made by insane people._

_(Sent 7:14am)_

_Hey! I said I was sorry._

_(Received 7:15am)_

_You didn't actually._

_(Sent 7:16am)_

_Oh. Shit. I'm sorry about last night Theo._

_I really am._

_(Received 7:18am)_

_For what?_

_(Sent 7:18am)_

_For locking you up in the bathroom._

_(Received 7:19am)_

_And?_

_(Sent 7:19am)_

_And what? For making you a pharmaceutical version of the unabomber? That's all on you dude._

_(Received 7:20am)_

_Apology not accepted._

_(Sent 7:20am)_

_What the fuck? Theoooo._

_(Received 7:21am)_

_It's my turn to Amelie your shit._

_I'll put plain salted potato chips in your coffee. In your shoes. In your duck. I'll replace all your potato chips with MY potato chips._

_(Sent 7:22am)_

_No! NOOO! Not Mr. Quackers!_

_Spare him! Torture me instead!_

_(Received 7:23am)_

_Fuck you. Lay's Original is amazing._

_Go eat your shitty shrimps._

_(Sent 7:24am)_

_Shut up. You had 2 bowls of my_

_shitty shrimps last night. You hypocrite._

_(Received 7:24am)_

_You shut up. Go to work._

  
  


Liam snickered and grinned to himself for winning another food battle, when he saw the timestamp on the message, he suddenly scrambled to finish his lukewarm coffee and swallowed-coughed his buttered toast, spewing crumbs to the kitchen counter he'll probably clean up when he gets back. He was running late. He left Mr. Quackers his food pellets as the duck flapped its flightless wings like a wave goodbye. "I'll be back. Don't eat the paint." Liam said and rushed outside to go to work.

  
  


_(Sent 11:40am)_

_What about The Auracle?_

**_Theo_ **

_(Received 11:41am)_

_What_

_(Sent 11:41am)_

_For my superhero name duh_

_(Received 11:42am)_

_That's pretty good._

_(Sent 11:42am)_

_Really? :D I knew it! I thought so too!_

_(Received 11:43am)_

_If you wanna sound like an 85 year old man in a cloak._

_(Sent 11:44am)_

_Fuck you. It can be like a Doctor Strange thing. I can be like Benedict Cumberbatch with the magic and the glowy orb thing_

_(Received 11:45am)_

_The only thing you have in common with Doctor Strange is a hospital which you need to get your head checked at because you're obviously insane._

_(Sent 11:45am)_

_Shut up. I think it suits me._

_I'm sticking with it._

_(Sent 11:46am)_

_What's for lunch?_

_(Received 11:47am)_

_Dunno. Haven't had one yet._

_(Received 11:47am)_

_Great! I'm almost there!_

_(Received 11:48am)_

_What?! No!_

  
  


Ten minutes later Theo found Liam idly waiting in front of Theo's building after a frantic and mildly threatening phone call convincing (forcing) Theo to _get down from there and eat dumplings with me or else I'll follow you home, it's up to you_ as Liam perfectly phrased. It wasn't too much of a hard sell since Theo _was_ in the mood for dumplings, coincidentally. _It's gonna have shrimp in it again, huh?_ To which Liam responded with a maniacal laughter on the phone. An exasperated _Fine_ from Theo ended the call.

"What? No kiss hello?" Liam said with a sly grin after Theo greeted him with a grunt followed by a huff. Theo, caught off guard by the question, seemed to freeze mid stride towards Liam two feet away, he wasn't against PDA but he wasn't really expecting a direct confrontation either since they haven't _really_ talked about _it._ Everything they've done with any hint of affection were pretty unprecedented and were unexpected reactions towards insane situations which were put upon them because _Liam._

"Woah, chill out, man. That was a joke." Liam said, dismissively, obviously sensing the internal conflict in Theo and his very very long pause. "Don't hurt yourse-" Liam was cut off by Theo suddenly shoving his face very closely to Liam's in an attempt to kiss him, unfortunately, Liam's surprised reflex was to slap Theo in the face. Hard. "Ow! What the fuck?" Theo said, touching carefully at his reddened cheek, a hiss escaping him _. So much for suave._

"Shit! I'm so sorry, I wasn't really expecting- You just came at me and it freaked me out!" Liam explained hurriedly, hands placed gently at the sides of Theo's face, trying to check for blood or bruising or unintentional scratches _because it has happened before._ Theo stared at him in disbelief.

_God, I just wanted to eat some dumplings._ Theo thought. Liam was still cupping Theo's face and soothingly rubbing Theo's cheek when Theo reached to hold Liam's hand to remove it and sighed. "It's okay. Let's just eat, I don't have much time." Theo said, still sounding a little pained and a lot more annoyed. "Okay. But can I ask one thing?" Liam said, as he stared right at him. Theo at this point is downright offended, after being slapped _hard,_ Liam has the nerve to ask for _one more thing?_ Theo sighed again. 

"What?" Theo clipped angrily. 

"Can you try again?" Liam said, eyes eager, tone hopeful and a little worried that this time Theo might slap him back in the face but with a _No._ Theo was stunned silent but had managed to nod, forgetting the slight stinging pain on his cheek as he pushed forward hesitantly to kiss Liam like the invitation is completely new territory. Liam met his lips halfway and kissed him back, eyes fluttered close, soft and slow and easy. _So easy._

They managed to break apart a few moments after, still feeling the tingling in their lips, awkwardly smiling to themselves while averting their gaze. Liam looked at the dog on a leash with a greenish aura in front of a coffee shop and Theo blew raspberries while looking at the blueness of the sky. Theo cleared his throat and awkwardly gestured his hands in front of Liam. "Uh, lead the way?" He winced, but Liam goes and surprisingly still herds Theo protectively to the greasy Chinese restaurant Liam mentioned in the mildly threatening phone call _._

Theo didn't want to admit it and was kind of hoping it was a little awful so he could shove it in Liam's face, but the food was pretty good considering Liam's weird taste in _everything;_ the egg fried rice was _to die for_ and so were the shrimp dumplings and buttered chicken and spring rolls with guess what? _Mangoes._ _A little MSG won't kill you,_ Liam said after they ordered, to which Theo just rolled his eyes in response yet heartily scarfed down the food once he tasted it. 

"Ooh. Fortune cookies!" Liam said excitedly as the waiter handed them each a complementary cookie with the bill. Liam cracked his first and munched on the dry cookie while he read the folded paper. "What the fuck?" Liam said incredulously. A little stunned and very obviously offended. "What? What does it say?" Theo asked curiously as he tried to reach for the tiny piece of paper, which Liam very quickly swiped away. "It's nothing! It's one of those bogus fortunes. You probably shouldn't read yours. They're fake anyway." Liam justified quickly. 

"Come on, it can't be that bad? Does it say you're crazy and you slap people, because we already know that." Theo said, Liam rolled his eyes and huffed, clutching the tiny piece of paper to his chest like it was some priceless treasure, holding onto it like Theo with his underwear at the laundromat. 

"I'll buy you ice cream to make you feel better, one of those artisanal fruit ones you love so much." Theo said comfortingly with a smile. "Yeah?" Liam said as he brightened up and went all giddy. 

_Sucker._ Theo thought as he reached forward and swiped the tiny piece of paper from Liam's loosened grip. "No! Theo! Nooo!" Liam protested as he tried to lunge forward with grabby hands at the fortune Theo held tightly mid air, away from Liam. Theo cleared his throat to read aloud the fortune in bold arial letters as Liam struggled to play and fail at a game of _Fortune Chicken_ , Theo skillfully avoiding the flailing grabby hands.

_"Your resemblance to a muppet will prevent the world from taking you seriously."_

Theo just downright cackled. Ruthlessly cackled the most sadistic cackle of all cackles in the century of cackles. Liam sunk into his chair slowly, both hands trying to hide his muppet face and its mortified muppet expression. "I don't- I don't-" Theo tried, gasping mid sentence as he cackles, "I don't know Liam-" he wheezed, "it seems pretty accurate to me!" Theo doesn't stop the cackling, his face red, eyes wet from tears, and completely out of breath, almost hyperventilating. "I think I peed myself a little." Liam scowled at him.

"But you're right. That's pretty mean." Theo said, a little calm now as he slowly shook his head in sympathy, "Just because you look like a muppet doesn't mean the world won't take you seriously, Liam." 

Liam did not hold back and kicked Theo right in the shin. "Ow! What the fuck? You're really violent today." Theo hissed and rubbed his leg, _that one's gonna bruise,_ he thought. "Gee Miss Piggy, what got your panties in a twist?" Theo said dryly and then broke into another giggle fit. "Are you done?" Liam said as he finally grabbed the piece of paper from Theo's fingers. "Why don't _you_ read yours? And we'll see how fortune cookies are made by a bunch of unhappy liars." Liam said indignantly as he crossed his arms and sunk into the booth.

"Okay, okay." Theo agreed and cracked his fortune cookie open. He held the piece of paper high up away from Liam's view as he cleared his throat. _"The austerity you see around you covers the richness of life like a veil."_ Theo said in an all-knowing, all-wise tone. Liam gawked in shock. "I think you're right fortune cookie, I think I do focus on the austerity around me too much that it makes it hard for me to enjoy life." Theo said agreeably to the fortune cookie in his hand as if in deep thought, nodding his head, and then ate it. A smirk on his face as he stared at Liam. Liam's mouth is still gaped open like fish out of water, stunned at the clear injustice in the fortune cookie industry. He couldn't believe it and grabbed the piece of paper from Theo to read it for himself, Theo snickered uninhibitedly. 

"This is clearly a hack! Why do you get some wise poetic saying while I get an insult!" Liam pouted indignantly. Theo gasped, eyes looking wild. "Shh, shh, Liam. The universe clearly knows what's up, don't fight the universe." Theo shushed him like Liam said something offensive, index finger pointed upward, annoying the hell out of Liam some more.

"Come on Miss Piggy, let's go get you some ice cream." Theo said as he stood up from the booth, Liam grumbled as he followed Theo outside. "I'd rather be Kermit."

Theo snorted. "Nahhh."

  
  


\---

  
  


"Liam, stop sending me pictures of your duck wearing weird hats." Theo said exasperatedly when he pressed the green button to answer Liam's call on a Thursday night. 

"Well, hello to you too." Liam greeted dryly. "And nope, I know you miss Mr. Quackers, because he misses you, you know?" Liam said, looking at the duck quacking loudly while walking around his apartment, doing its nightly rounds like the brave and adorable sidekick that he is. Theo scoffs.

"Open your camera so he can see you!" Liam ordered a little loudly, Theo winced at the volume but opened his camera with a huff. Theo's on his couch and _surprise, surprise,_ is eating his godawful potato chips as if to spite Liam. Liam frowns but directs the camera to the duck circling his living room. "I think he's aura's changing colors. I'm not sure but I think it has a maroonish shade to it now, like dried blood and soot, you know?" Liam gasped at the sudden realization. "Do you think I've cheated death?" 

Theo's still munching on his chips a little nonchalantly. "Maybe." 

"Hey! This affects you too, you know." Liam said, reminding Theo again of the whole idea of him possibly dying or possibly being depressed, or Liam possibly being insane. He's personally leaning towards the latter a lot more. "Maybe we can change the color of your aura too!" Liam said excitedly, a hopeful look on his face. "It means I'm doing something right with Mr. Quackers, right? Could it be the hats?" 

"Maybe the duck's just hungry and now that it's fed, it's starting to feel better." Theo said not really thinking too much about the whole thing. "Or you've saved it from a pond monster. Who knows?" He's still casually munching on his chips.

"Okay, what's wrong Theo?" Liam asked. "I can sense something is obviously bothering you, you usually eat that godawful-" Liam paused as Theo glowered at him, "erm- that _kind_ of potato chips when you're upset. Did something happen today?"

"Nothing." Theo said succinctly. His face blank, eyes a little hollow as he shrugged. 

"Alright, that's it." Liam said exasperatedly at Theo. "We're sleeping over!" He yelled at the duck as it flapped its flightless wings in surprise. "What?! Liam! No! And what do you mean _We_?" Theo shouted over the call. The camera's all shaky as Liam rushes to his bedroom and rummages through his things, grabbing an overnight bag, leaving Theo staring at Liam's bedroom ceiling. "Call you later, Theo!" Liam yelled, ending the call.

  
  


"It's been a long day, Liam." Theo said as he opened the door to Liam carrying Mr. Quackers in a padded bag clearly for tiny poodles or dachshunds in one shoulder, and a bag of groceries in one hand. "I promise I'll tone down the crazy. But you gotta work on your greetings, Theo." Liam answered back as he made his way inside Theo's apartment, grabbing Theo's shirt, pulling him forward and kissing him softly and quickly. Theo's still a little stunned, but reflexively kisses him back. 

Theo doesn't know how it happened but it's become a thing now, whenever they see each other, which is happening more often than Theo had initially wanted, dealing with Liam's crazy antics and all _(at best in small increments he'd hoped),_ they kiss or sometimes they make out - _like really make out_ , with the occasional light petting. Now they even talk a lot and spend an insane amount of lunches together, Liam still follows Theo to the toilet but well, _you can't win them all._ Theo's really not against it and maybe finds it _kinda nice_ more than he's willing to admit gun to his head, he just doesn't understand what the hell's happening. None of them seem to want to bring it up to the other either, both not wanting to pop whatever bubble they've trapped themselves in, godforbid they say the wrong thing. So Theo just goes with it, and tries not to think too much about it. _Well, he tries. Oh god, is he dating Liam? Does he like Liam?_

"Hey, I asked you if you wanted pistachio or dark chocolate fudge ice cream?" Liam asked, shaking Theo out of his internal panic, placing the pints of ice cream on the kitchen island and a huge bag of Lay's Original potato chips to Theo's genuine surprise. Liam must have noticed Theo's gaping stare. "Figured one bag wouldn't be enough for you since you're clearly upset over some _'nothing'."_ Liam said, gesturing air quotes, to a now broken Theo. He was surprised to see Theo suddenly lunging at him, he almost slapped him in the face again. An oof escaped Liam as he braced the impact of Theo's body against his, both Theo's arms wrapping around his shoulders tightly in a hug, leaving Liam stunned at Theo's unexpected display of affection over bland potato chips. Liam, paralyzed by the hold, pats Theo's back gently in a _there-there_ motion. "And maybe it wouldn't taste as bland and as awful with ice cream." Liam whispers over Theo's shoulder, wincing while still dreading eating the pretentious junk food - _clearly with not enough MSG_. Liam thought. Theo glares at the snide remark but still lingers in the hug. 

"Shut up and let me express my gratitude."

"Is that what this is?" Liam asked, tone visibly amused. 

"Can you express it with ice cream being shoved into our mouths instead?" Liam asked, moments later after staring at the ice cream melting on the kitchen island. _Liam can't really stand melted ice cream._

  
  


The night went pretty quietly surprisingly, Liam really tried his best at containing the _'crazy',_ whatever that meant. _No locking Theo in bathrooms,_ Liam was sure that was part of the list, but why would he do that now, they're both in Theo's apartment. _Sometimes Theo just doesn't make sense_. Liam thought as he stared at Theo in the mirror, brushing his teeth next to him. 

"Can I sleep here?" Liam asked Theo as he stood in the doorway of Theo's bedroom, clutching the pillow he lent him a few minutes earlier when they said good night as Liam settled into the heaven sent couch, Mr. Quackers sleeping in his own poodle-dachshund padded bag converted to a mini bed. "I'm surprised you even asked." Theo replied, scooting over to give Liam a side of the bed. "I'd probably wake up to you strangling me anyway, might as well ruin the surprise." Liam rolled his eyes. "Toning down the _crazy_ like I promised." He singsonged, humoring Theo. "And I was not strangling you. I was trying to check for your pulse." Liam justified, like it was a reasonable thing to do to someone asleep. 

Theo lifted the duvet and Liam slid into the bed carefully. Burying himself deep into the mattress and making himself comfortable. Liam quickly placed his arm over Theo's chest and his leg atop his thighs, his face rested against Theo's neck as he held on and sighed deeply as if it was the most natural thing. "You okay?" Liam asked after a moment of settling in. "God, your feet are like ice." Theo answered more matter-of-factly rather than in protest, staring straight at the ceiling, not really making any shift in his position to move Liam away, instead he melts into the touch and burrows into it a little, breathing deep as well. "No, I mean, are you okay? Did something happen today?" Liam said, Theo shifts his head slightly to look at Liam, curious of his expression, and then turns back to the ceiling. "Nothing happened. Well, the same thing always happens." Theo huffed. "I keep thinking about what it is that I want to do and I think I want to write." 

"But? I feel like there's a but there." Liam followed, looking at Theo intently, patiently. "But I don't know if I'm any good or if anybody would care about what I would write." Theo said, sighing deeply as he finished the sentence, worry and doubt washing over him like a huge wave. 

"I think you have your whole life to figure it out." Liam said softly. "And you might write dumb shit now but I think over time it gets better, it gets easier. We learn what we like and what we don't like." Liam said as he caressed Theo's arm, tracing smooth lines on his skin. "And don't worry about people caring, what's important is _you_ care. And that's more than enough." Liam reassured, whispering a little as he played with Theo's hair, combing it slightly while Theo mumbled some incoherent affirmation, eyes fluttering close as the touch lulled him to sleep. Liam yawned quietly as he burrowed his face in Theo's neck. "'Night."

  
  


Liam woke up in the morning finding it hard to breathe, feeling a slight pressure on his neck. His eyes flickered open as his gaze settled into his surroundings, holding onto his bearings as he tried to remember where he was and sees Theo's face grinning at him with a murdery glint in his eyes and his fingers on Liam's neck. "What the fuck?!" Liam shouted as he scrambled away from Theo's grip in surprise. 

"Oh don't mind me, I was just trying to check for your pulse." Theo said mockingly sweet at Liam who was now lying on the floor as he struggled to push himself away from Theo, falling ungracefully off the bed instead, a loud thud and an 'ow' escaping him as his back collided with the floor. Theo snickered as he peered down at Liam who was glaring at him and giving him the finger. "Come on, let's get breakfast." Theo said as he hauled Liam up to his feet. 

"You really need to work on your bedside manner." Liam groaned, staggering to follow Theo out of the room, rubbing at his aching back.

  
  


"Are you free this Saturday?" Liam asked, clutching at the brown to-go bag of pecan mud pie from the diner they just came from, Mr. Quackers snuggled into his padded bag trying to peck at the warm pie. Theo was caught off-guard, mind starting to reel for reasons why Liam would ask. _For a date?_ Theo thought as he swallowed a lump on his throat. _Or was Liam planning some crazy shit again? Is he planning to lock me up for a whole weekend? At least he had the decency to ask this time. He had to give Liam that._ Theo eyed him dubiously, as he turned off the engine of the truck and turned to Liam who was nervously folding and unfolding the brown paper bag, small droplets of sweat forming on his forehead, his gaze averting Theo's. "Why? What did you have in mind?" Theo asked, voice sounding relatively calm. Liam finally looked up, an excited gleam in his eyes, a small smile starting to form. 

"Do you have a black suit?" Liam asked giddily, practically bouncing in his seat now. "Nothing too fancy though! It's just that the venue requires it." Liam reassured. 

_Was Liam asking him out to a fancy dinner?_ Theo thought, face stunned as he gaped at Liam, his mind internally panicking at the prospect of Liam taking the initiative to ask Theo out to something as serious as a fancy dinner, sure they've spent a million lunches and breakfasts together but those were not meals you have to prepare for, not like a _dinner_ where you reserve shit and think about what to wear and not _ambush_ people to make them eat with you _._ And a _fancy dinner_ to boot. Theo knows they haven't talked about their _weird relationship_ , they've just mostly talked about the _weird_ part (which was _Liam),_ but not the _relationship_ part. _Was this it? Were they finally gonna talk about it?_ _Were they finally gonna acknowledge this strange sexual tension, and the abrupt making out sessions and bedsharing? Is this gonna be a thing-thing?_ Theo gulped, heart beating fast. _Shit. Shit. Okay._

"I do." Theo croaked and tried to clear his throat. "Okay, I'll be there." He answered, he couldn't help but smile as his cheeks started to blush. Liam beamed at him. "Okay! Great! I'll text you the details." Liam said in a higher pitch than usual. Suddenly pouncing on Theo and grabbing the front of his shirt, kissing him intensely. His tongue licking deep, eliciting a surprised moan from Theo, excitement seeping through Liam like a puppy running after a tennis ball. 

"Thanks, Theo!" Liam said after breaking the moment in soft quick kisses, trying to smooth Theo's creased shirt, finally opening the door and stepping out of the truck, leaving a disheveled Theo as he gaped at Liam's retreating back. 

"Uhh. You too." Theo gulped.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Dude, what is up with you lately?" Mason huffed as he played some kind of duck fetch with Mr. Quackers who was wearing a tiny cowboy hat, throwing pellets at it, the duck frantically shaking its head at the different directions the pellets were being thrown at, completely overwhelmed, hat sliding on its long neck instead. "It feels like weeks since we last talked. Tried calling you, man, but I keep going to voicemail. I missed you, I was starting to worry." Mason said a little anxiously. Liam knows he's been neglecting his best friend duties ever since this whole _probable_ harbinger of death-emotional sensor thing has happened. He's also missed a few Sunday Funday brunches with Mason to hang out with Theo instead - _to keep him safe,_ which was _blasphemous_ if Mason ever found out, so he understands why Mason's pissed at him, but he won't tell Mason. _He can't know._

"I'm so sorry, Mase. I've been busy with work and the aura thing, and Theo possibly dying, and Mr. Quackers finally not dying, which I think was from my duck therapy or maybe from wearing hats? I think he enjoys it." Liam explained in one breath, tilting his head at the duck. "By the way, you have this incredible purple aura, like deep plum. It's really pretty." Liam added, mouth in awe, his fingers trying to reach its incorporeal form in the air, swishing his hand around. 

"Stop trying to flatter my aura." Mason said as he swatted away Liam's hand hovering over his head. Still clearly pissed at being abandoned for a few consecutive Sunday Fundays. " _Oh._ Wait, wait. So you're still talking to this Theo guy?" Mason said with an intrigued look. "The hot guy with the incredible arms and horrible taste in junk food? I see. I see." Mason nodded his head. _Liam does not see._

"Yes, Mason. We're still talking." Liam answered carefully, confused by which direction this conversation was going.

"And he's talking to you _willingly?_ He doesn't think you're a lunatic?" Mason asked all serious, Liam just rolled his eyes. "Yes! I mean yes he's talking to me willingly," Liam mumbled, "not that I'm _threatening_ him. _Well, not so much, most of it is harmless anyway,_ but that's besides the point. I'm still trying to keep something bad from happening to him and he understands, I think. It's like therapy? If it's working for Mr. Quackers, it might work on Theo. Whatever _it_ is." Liam huffed. "And he doesn't think I'm a lunatic." _Well, not so much. He thinks._

"I think he likes you." Mason said succinctly, nodding his head like he's figured out some grand secret of the universe and felt smug about finding out first, Liam's eyebrows furrowing with disbelief. _What the hell is Mason talking about?_ "How did we go from him thinking I'm a _'lunatic',_ to him liking me?" Liam asked, gesturing in air quotes. 

"It's precisely because you're a lunatic that I know he likes you." Mason justified, like the sentence made the most sense in the world. _Does Liam make crazy attractive? Not that he's crazy._ Liam thought briefly. "Theo doesn't like me." Liam protested, interrupting Mason's train of thought. "He complains how I ambush him at work and at his apartment and how I drag him around on his days off, and when I follow him into toilets, and my cooking! He pushed me into a pond, Mason! Can you believe that? He doesn't _like_ me."

"What do you mean you follow him into toilets?" _Oops._ Liam thought. _I wasn't supposed to say that._

"With everything that I just said, _that's_ what sticks?" Liam eyed Mason, a little miffed, he didn't even bat an eye at the being pushed into a pond thing. Or even the cooking thing. And Liam's an amazing cook. _Unbelievable._ Mason's still waiting for Liam to illuminate him on this particularly strange behavior, a shocked look on his face. Liam sighed. "To prevent him from getting stabbed, dude! Do you know how many people get stabbed in toilets? A lot of people!" Liam reasoned, raising his arms wide as if he's measuring how many people get stabbed in toilets. "What did you think?"

"Okay, okay. I get it." Mason sighed, arms raised placatingly. 

Liam gasped, catching onto what Mason was possibly insinuating. "You thought I was a pervert?!" Liam looked at Mason indignantly, his tone annoyed and hurt. It was a different thing to be given strange, judging looks by people in toilets, who were complete strangers by the way, he didn't give a shit about them. But it's a whole new thing to be judged by his best friend. That's the shit that hurts. 

"No. No, man, it's just very weird for people to follow other people into toilets if they're not gonna pee. Did you pee?" Mason reasoned calmly. _Liam did not pee._ A mortified expression dawned on Liam's face as he slowly realized the strangeness in the behavior, _is that why Theo keeps leaving him in toilets?_

"Oh god. I _am_ a pervert. A _weirdo_ pervert." 

"No. No, buddy." Mason patted Liam's back soothingly. "You're just a little socially inept, a little weird yes, but that's okay. You just gotta be careful you don't get arrested, okay? People might misunderstand all the _following around._ I know you mean well." Mason said, calmly holding Liam's shoulder, grounding him. 

"I do! I would follow _you_ to toilets too, man, if I knew you were going to die soon." Liam squeaked. 

"Aww, that's so sweet." Mason said, genuinely touched, a comforting smile on his face.

Mason cleared his throat, getting back to his point before they were derailed by _one_ of Liam's borderline crazy behavior. "So, it's pretty clear that he doesn't mind your crazy as much as he minds not spending time with you. How much have you been spending time with this guy again?" 

"I-" Liam stuttered. He hasn't thought about it too much, but he's spending almost everyday with Theo. And they talk a lot. _Like a lot._ Especially if you count their duck meme battles. Well, he needs to check up on him so he'd know he was alive, that was part of the deal. _Duck memes are a bonus._ And they eat a lot of breakfasts and lunches together, _mostly due to Liam threat- convincing Theo but he often comes willingly,_ because they need to eat or else they'd starve and die, obviously. And they kiss a lot because, _because,_ _oh god._

"Point taken." Mason said simply, shooting a finger gun at Liam's face as it changes from confused to mortified.

"Oh my god." Liam said, flustered at the revelation. "Are we dating?!"

"Wait, what?" Mason said cluelessly, clearly confused at the sudden leap in Liam's thought process. 

"Are we dating and I didn't even know?!" Liam was practically yelling now, pacing through his living room, startling Mr. Quackers while he ate the pellets off the floor. "We spend so much time together, Mase, I mean, _so much._ Almost everyday!" Liam wheezed. "And we-" Liam paused, trying to breathe deep, feeling the panic rise. "We kiss!" Liam yelled, startling Mason with the heightened energy. "Like full blown making out and it feels _really good._ He's such a good kisser." Liam was spiralling. "Is that dating? Are we dating?!" 

"Okay, okay, calm down." Mason said. "Breathe." Patting Liam in the back again and gesturing for him to sit down on the couch. Liam inhaled deep, releasing air slowly, calming his nerves. "So you kissed?" Mason asked with an amused expression after a few moments of Liam doing some kind of _Lamaze._ "Yeah." Liam croaked. "Yeah, I kissed him first and then he kissed me back all hungry and intense! _Which I wasn't expecting, but not complaining though. Not complaining._ And I don't know, I guess it's a thing now, we kiss whenever we feel like it? I just thought that yeah, why not? _It feels nice._ You know? There are just _these moments,_ and he gives me that _look._ Like he _wants_ me? And I can't help it. It pulls me in." Liam rambled. "It just feels so _easy,_ Mase."

"Do you like him?"

"I don't know." Liam groaned, starting to feel nauseous, his stomach doing little somersaults. "I haven't given it much thought, I don't know if it's just a physical thing 'cause he's really hot and that face and those greenish gray eyes that drown me like a fucking sea monster. _God."_ Liam confessed, brushing his hand through his hair. "But he's also like, really funny and really smart, although he pisses me off a lot, and we get into these tiny arguments like him hating on shrimp and burritos, but he likes those really bland potato chips? Like what the fuck. _Ugh. I don't know."_ Liam sighed heavily in distress.

Mason clapped on his back lightly. "You'll figure it out, buddy. You always do. You're a little slow on the uptake sometimes but you'll get there. And once you do and you're ready, you need to talk it out with this guy. DTR this shit." 

"What if he doesn't want to _DTR this shit?"_ Liam asked, anxiety creeping up on him. "What if it's just a physical thing for him and I - _hypothetically -_ have these feelings and he doesn't?" Liam's eyes looked downcast as he looked back at Mason for some sign of relief. 

"Then he's stupid." Mason declared curtly. "If he doesn't feel things for you when you _hypothetically_ do, then you move on. If he's not on the same page with you and what you _hypothetically_ want, he's not for you. No matter how pretty his sea monster eyes are." Mason said with a consoling smile. "You're too good for him anyway."

Liam smiled back. "Can I still make out with him while I figure shit out?" 

"I guess? If he lets you." Mason grinned back, amused at Liam's confusing priorities, he cleared his throat. "So. You spend time with him _almost everyday?"_ Mason asked, an eyebrow raised high questioningly, lips formed in a line as he continued. "Even on Sundays?" Liam gulped, feeling the cold sweat forming in his pits and in his palms and in his feet. "Do you have _Sunday Funday brunches_ with him, Liam?" 

_That was it. Shit. Shit. Shit._

Liam was stunned speechless at the sudden confrontation. He could never lie for shit especially to Mason. Mason was like Liam's CIA, NSA, PTA. He knew shit before shit even happened. So he reflexively chooses to practice his right to remain silent, anything he says can be used against him in Mason's court of law. Speaking would only implicate him further. 

"I knew it! I knew it! _Sacrilegious!"_ Mason shouted, suddenly standing up, noticing that Liam went quiet for a long time, appalled at the blatant betrayal to their brotherhood, to their Sunday Funday covenant, to their _Sunday Funday dance._ "How dare you?! Do you know how many Sunday Funday brunches I've had with Corey?! I love the guy but he's so uncoordinated! And tone deaf. He's tone deaf, Liam! It's embarrassing doing the Sunday Funday _song and dance_ in public with an uncoordinated, tone deaf brunch partner! It needs to be done in perfect synchrony _and_ harmony or else it's all in vain! All in vain!" Mason squawked, arms raised high like he's asking the Sunday Funday deities to smite Liam. 

"I'm so sorry, Mason!" Liam pleaded. "I didn't mean to spend a lot of Sunday Funday brunches with Theo, but he was _there_ and it was _Sunday_ and it was _brunch."_

"That's it! I forbid you from kissing that Theo guy!"

"Wha- you can't do that!" Liam protested. "Let me make it up to you! Please! We'll spend this Sunday Funday together and you can have all the mimosas and Caprese Eggs Benedict and bacon in the whole world!" Liam shrilled, trying to appease Mason and said Sunday Funday deities. Mason went silent, seemingly considering Liam's offer. "Unlimited French toasts and pancakes?" Mason countered with pursed lips, squinting at Liam. "Yes! All the delicious carbs your forgiving heart desires. I'm buying." Liam reassured, eyes wild and big, he beamed, ignoring how broke this sacrificial brunch will make him. 

"Fine." Mason agreed after a few moments of careful contemplation, a smile slowly tugging on his lips breaking into a full blown grin, Liam grinned back. "You know I can't resist you, man. But no backsies! I can't handle the trauma." Mason warned.

"Absolutely, I'd be there even if I was dead, I'd come back as a ghost or a zombie just so we could have Sunday Funday! I'd claw my way out of my grave and crawl out of the dirt just to rush to our brunch. We'd probably eat different things at that point, me eating human flesh and all, but I'll be there. That's how much I love you, man." Liam swore, gesturing a crossing motion over his heart.

"Intense." Mason said. "But sweet. Love you too, man."

"And you know what, we didn't even have mimosas in our brunches! Theo refused to make one! He kept making me coffee and pushing it towards me like a maniac." Liam whisper-shouted, sounding absolutely horrified. 

"Coffee?! The profanity!" Mason gasped, a hand on his chest, appalled at the blatant disrespect of denying alcoholic beverages during brunch. 

"Brunch virgin." Liam tsked, shaking his head.

"Brunch virgin." Mason repeated in agreement.

  
  


\---

  
  


"Holy crap you look amazing." Liam gaped in awe at Theo when he opened the passenger door of Theo's truck. Theo couldn't help but blush at the sudden compliment, throwing him off completely, his ears turning red. He tried to hide it by trying to look at anything else but Liam - unsuccessfully. Because his gaze kept coming back to Liam who looked really good as hell, really cute and dapper with the deep blue colored bow tie, the dark tweed jacket matching it, and the pink shirt complimenting his bright blue eyes, and _god, the pushed back hair._ He was so fucking adorable Theo wanted to smother him and keep him in his jacket pocket forever. 

"I know I said black suit but I realized I didn't have any! So I went for whatever formal thing I had." Liam reasoned when he noticed Theo staring at him for a while. "I used to have this teaching thing at this posh private school and teenagers could be real assholes so I had to up my game. Does it look bad? Will it ruin the stealthiness of the mission?" Theo gulped. His mind's blank except for: _Hot professor. Hot professor. Hot professor._

Liam in bow ties and tweed jackets will ruin him.

"Theo? Ground control to Major Theo?" Liam said, waving a hand at Theo's face as he stared dumbly at Liam's _everything._

"Yes professor?" Theo blurted out. _Shit. Did I say that outloud?_ Theo thought. Liam was stunned, his eyes widening and his cheeks suddenly flushing red. Theo winced, realizing the idiotic thing he just said, but knowing Theo, he refuses to acknowledge the blundering mess that he actually is and decides to just roll with it. _Fuck it._

"Yes? Professor?" He repeated awkwardly, enunciating so many syllables wrongly with so much confidence it physically hurt. The straining smile plastered on his face making him look a little manic as he tried hard to pass it off as cool. _Cool as school. Shit._ Liam must've noticed the strain in Theo's face and went quiet for a bit, contemplating what to say as he opened and closed his mouth but no words came out. _Run, Liam. Run. Save yourself._ Theo thought. _I know I would._

While Theo was internally freaking out and wishing for the ground to swallow him whole, Liam suddenly smiled. "Is this a kink thing?" Liam whispered close to Theo's ear, sending tiny prickles in Theo's nape, like other people other than the two of them in the truck might hear him, snapping Theo out of physically hurting himself further. "What. No!" Theo flustered. "'Cause if that's what you're into, _I can be into it."_ Liam said quietly, waggling his eyebrows furiously. "I can teach you stuff, Theo." Liam winked a not so graceful wink. Liam doesn't really know how to wink.

"What? No! I mean yeah, I can be into that but no! That's not-" Theo huffed, he didn't know how to articulately undig himself from the kink hole he dug himself into in the brief fifteen minutes he's been with Liam. He was cut off by a loud snort from beside him, clearly finding amusement in Theo's misery. "I know you had a thing for being ordered around but I didn't know it was this bad, do you like spanking?" Liam gasped, tone a little giddy than Theo had expected given how awkward everything is. _Seriously?_

"I don-" Theo paused. He can't help but mull over what the fuck Liam just asked, noticing the menacing Cheshire cat smile on Liam's face. "Shut up." Theo grunted dismissively and shoved Liam's face away with his hand. Liam was now cackling, Theo didn't know if he was serious, Theo didn't know if he wanted Liam to be serious. _At least half serious?_

"I'm serious though." Liam said bluntly. _Get out of my head, Liam._ Theo thought.

The crazy serious look Theo saw on Liam's face said he really was. The look which usually would've freaked Theo out and would've forced him to open the truck's door and sprint the hell away, but he couldn't help get pulled into it now. Theo swallowed the thick feeling in his throat, _why was it so hot all of a sudden? Was the AC not working?_ Liam slowly crept closer, Theo didn't notice he was doing the same. He felt Liam's fingers brush lightly on his cheek pulling him gently forward, kissing his lips soft and warm, a little too softly for the light kinky role playing they've just briefly talked about. Theo kissed him back just as soft, just as warm, tongue chasing Liam's lips, his hand rubbing Liam's neck. 

"Hey." Liam said eloquently after breaking the kiss. Staring deeply at Theo's lips then his eyes for a moment like he was studying the creases and the colors, the kiss bitten red and the sea monster green. "Hey." Theo exhaled. 

"So, where to?"

"Oh. Uh. I entered the location on the GPS." Liam stammered, trying to capture his bearings. Theo nodded and started driving.

  
  


"Liam?" Theo asked after a few minutes of Liam's uncomfortably comfortable ramblings about brunch etiquette and that it was a cuisine of its own _\- a lifestyle._ "Yeah?" Liam replied, looking a little annoyed at Theo for being interrupted.

"What are we doing at a funeral?" 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I made them kiss a lot. Like a lot. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed imagining them doing it. Haha. Oop.
> 
> Sexual tension. Sexual tension. Sexual. Tension.
> 
> Also the fortunes are actually real ones in case you were wondering so credit goes to the fortune cookie industry. 
> 
> Thanks to @iMightbdprssed for reminding me of Liam's betrayal to the brunch gods and to Mason, that was so fun to write. They were peak drama queens.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed even just some parts of my chaotic drabble.
> 
> Comments and kudos are highly appreciated!


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